Looking for an assisted living situation for BPD Sister

[Broken1969]

Hi - my sister's BPD is getting out of control. She simply cannot live alone (and no family member wants to live with her).

Is there such as thing as an assisted living type situation for mentally ill people? She needs a place where she has some independence but also lots of people around and professionals to check in on her to make sure she's taking care of herself.

Any suggestions would be much appreciated. We're kind of at our wit's end here

[madeline7]

In the state where I live, most Assisted Living Communities have an age restriction, so if someone is younger that 60 or 62, an exception is needed based on medical necessity. There are also smaller Board and Care Homes, which can provide more oversight but generally have older frail residents. The challenge with placing a pwBPD in a residential care facility is that the communities are set up for seniors with either mobility or cognitive issues, not individuals with mental illness. When someone with mental illness enters those types of places, we often see them either being asked to leave, or they become dissatisfied and leave on their own. The disruptive behaviors may not ne a good fit. I am in the field, so I have experience with Assisted Living. In challenging cases, we suggest hiring a Case Manager, if the individual is older, a Geriatric Case Manager.

[Broken1969]

TY madeline7 -

That's what I'm finding here in NJ too. TY for your response.

[camilla]

I'm sorry, I don't have any advice but just wanted to say I feel for you and I'm going to be facing a similar situation with my low-functioning BPD sister who is now in her late 40's. She has been living off the financial means of others her whole life. She hasn't been able to hold a job for the last 20+ years and has survived by relying on men, until they can't stand the situation anymore and leave/throw her out. My parents have also financially enabled her most of her adult life, probably out of guilt, but have now stopped. She's deteriorated in the past few years and isn't able to hook people in like she used to in order to use them and she's become more and more unstable. My family is also very small and no one can live with her, she's actually quite dangerous when she is unstable and has been arrested several times in the past few years. The future looks very bleak and I don't know what to do for her... .