New here—interested in looking at my part in BPD relationships

[Depression = 72% of members]

I’ve been reading the information on the bpdfamily website and finding it illuminating, non-judgemental, and helpful, so I decided to sign up. I have a parent with BPD traits and current and past significant others diagnosed with BPD.  I appreciate the information on BPD and relationships with pwBPD and I am interested in looking at my part in the relationships and what I can do to stop making things worse and, hopefully, make changes in my behavior and thinking that might help these relationships, or at least help restore me to some sanity.  

[Interstitial]

I’ve been reading the information on the bpdfamily website and finding it illuminating, non-judgemental, and helpful, so I decided to sign up. I have a parent with BPD traits and current and past significant others diagnosed with BPD.  I appreciate the information on BPD and relationships with pwBPD and I am interested in looking at my part in the relationships and what I can do to stop making things worse and, hopefully, make changes in my behavior and thinking that might help these relationships, or at least help restore me to some sanity.  

[Turkish]

Hi Interstitial,



One of our senior members likes to quip,  "all roads lead to [this board]."  Myself? I started on the relationship boards then landed here as I started to look back at my family.  Then my mom admitted to me that she probably had BPD.  It felt like the cosmic tumblers fell into place,  and here I stayed. 

What's gone on with your parent and how can we help support you?

Turkish

[Mutt]

Hi Interstitial,



I'd like to join Turkish and welcome you to bpdfamily. It's all fascinating isn't it? I can relate with that new car smell with bpdfamily it's discovering key answers with all sorts of r/s's. Do you want to tell us a little bit more about what's going on?

[heartandwhole]

Hi Interstitial,



I'd like to join Mutt and Turkish in welcoming you to the community. I'm glad you decided to post. Even though there can be many similarities in members' situations, it really helps to get targeted advice and support for your specific relationship issues.

Your goals here sound very healthy. It's often difficult to look at our part of the relationship dynamics. The good news is that change for the better is possible.  

Which parent has BPD traits, and what behaviors have felt crazy-making?

heartandwhole

[baylady]

This board helps me feel validated and does help with suggestions for setting boundaries, etc.  I do also have a therapist who has helped me immensely.  She won't come right out and say that my sister probably has BPD because professionally she can't diagnose someone she hasn't seen.  She has, however, brought it up and is helping me with boundary setting and tools for dealing my with sister and parents, who are enmeshed.  She has helped me change how I react to things, which is really the only thing I have control of.