First post ever

[Juglans21]

Hi all,
Giving this a try as part of something my therapist recommended.
My younger sibling has BPD - formally diagnosed multiple times by multiple different providers. She can be extremely abusive, demeaning, and has been the cause of countless family conflicts.
I’ve had to bear the brunt of most of it and need a space where folks might understand and offer advice.
I live in another state with my husband but she terrorizes our family very often, often keeping them up throughout the night. Causes me panic attacks thinking about what’s going on, but not being able to do anything about it

[pursuingJoy]

I've found this site really helpful in dealing with my pwBPD. I'm glad your therapist introduced us!

Causes me panic attacks thinking about what’s going on, but not being able to do anything about it

What exactly causes you panic?

Is your sister in treatment, or has she ever been?

Many of us can relate to the chaos that one family member can cause. We talk about boundary setting and other useful tools. Probably most helpful to me was actually reframing the way I understood BPD and what it does. Understanding it pragmatically meant I didn't have to take the manipulation personally. It increased my empathy for the person's struggle, and on the flip side, gave me clarity about what boundaries were needed and I enforced them without guilt.

Change is possible. Hope is possible. It takes work and sometimes it doesn't feel good or fair, but we're here and we get it.

pj

[NayaDee]

Hello!

I'm also new and have a younger sibling who was recently diagnosed with BPD. I too have had to bear the brunt of the conflicts and have only just begun recognizing how much it affects me. I don't have much advice to offer but I'm glad we found a safe place to discuss our sibling and their impact on our family and lives.