Just discovered my boyfriend of 8 years has BPD.. need help

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hello, I have just discovered that my boyfriend of 8 years, on and off, has BPD. I am so lost as to how to go further with this. I read the entire “How to stop walking on eggshells” book and will be reading it again and again. I need help. He is so hard to talk to. I just need respect and to stop being mentally/physically harmed. I have a therapist, who is amazing, she is the one who told me to read that book. Just need some more advice on how to tell him the things I need in order to not feel so horrible and depressed... I feel like I’m mentally deteriorating. I just want to have more of the good times and respect. I love him and want to make this better.

[Honey777]

Hello, I have just discovered that my boyfriend of 8 years, on and off, has BPD. I am so lost as to how to go further with this. I read the entire “How to stop walking on eggshells” book and will be reading it again and again. I need help. He is so hard to talk to. I just need respect and to stop being mentally/physically harmed. I have a therapist, who is amazing, she is the one who told me to read that book. Just need some more advice on how to tell him the things I need in order to not feel so horrible and depressed... I feel like I’m mentally deteriorating. I just want to have more of the good times and respect. I love him and want to make this better.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Jabiru]

Hello and welcome. Maybe there's no 100% conflict-free way to do it. Try to get him when he's in a good mood. Be prepared for any of the consequences.

I also recommend reading Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist. It helped me to listen to my own feelings and stand up for them.

Good luck and keep us posted.