My girlfriend broke up with me 3,5 weeks ago. She was diagnosed with BPD in her younger adulthood. This break up came after a while of ups and downs in her mood. This related to work, shes been home from work for 7 weeks because there is no job for her to do right now. She needs something to do or else she is feeling worthless. Around the same time she left work we found out that her mother has lung cancer. My girlfriend took that very hard and her anxiety got worse, she began to lack out of sleep and I know that she havent felt this bad for a very long time. The weekend before she broke up with me we went out for a romantic dinner and went to a consert where we were kissing and hugging and it all felt normal and I was glad that we could have a good night and for a little while forgot all the problems.
The day she broke up with me was over this stupid thing. It was a GIF that I posted on her FB wall. She begun to complain about why I did it, why I started caring about her now and showing on FB that I love her. The same morning she got into i fight with her sick mother and somehow it felt like I got the "
PLEASE READ" for that fight.
She wants us to be friends in the future so she has not deleted me from social media, she just restricted me so we can be apart for a while. Then she started to send one text a week about silly stuff. She´s checking my instagramstories only when she knows that I´m hanging out with my sister. Last week I ran in to her and friendly askedher if she wanted to grab some coffe. At first she said no, we need to keep distance. But then she changed her mind. We hung out for 4 houers and and texted for 4 more houres.After the coffe she drove me home and gave me a tshirt that I left at her place. I colud se that she still has my home key together with her outher keys, she did not return that, but she returned my clothes. She told me that she hoped I did´t got the hope about us beeing back together just because we had coffe. Last time we broke up, she was quick to solve all things with stuff and keys, but now she has a lot of things back at my place. This time she even keep in touch with my family and friends. I do find it so strange this behavor of hers. I guess that it is a bit to much for her to handle right now with the lack of job and the cancer. And her being sad and depressed and hating herself makes her incapable of having a relationship at the moment because of the fear that I will leave her when shes at her bottom.
I don´t know, everything is just so confusing and I miss her so much
