Emotional incest as a child still affects me to this day

[Adultchildofabpd]

Hello,

I am really struggling and would like to reach out. I am a 40 year old female and still suffering the emotional trauma from my borderline mother. I cannot seem to cut her out of my life even though I know how harmful her behaviour is. I am doing some work on my past Trauma with a specialist who understands now but need to feel I'm not alone so I joined this network to learn more about other's experiences too. I went through a lot of emotional incest and raging abuse. Too scared to have a relationship. Very immobilised.

[Kwamina]

Hi AdultchildofaBPD

You are not alone! Welcome to bpdfamily

Emotional incest is very difficult to deal with and I can understand how this can seriously affect you even to this day.

Could you perhaps tell us a bit more about your mother? Has she for instance been diagnosed with BPD or perhaps any other disorder?

Being raised by a BPD parent can be quite traumatizing, I am glad you are working with a specialist to help you process your experiences.

We have a thread here about emotional incest that you might find helpful:

Emotional or covert incest: discussing it and healing from it

In that thread other members share their experiences with emotional incest and we discuss ways of coping with and healing from it.

[HappyChappy]

You're not alone, pretty much everyone on here has experience of a BPD close relationships. You're also a very popular age for this board so it took many of us this long to get here, but the main thing is you're doing something about it. You'll find a wealth of knowledge on here. I came here around  2 years ago,  feeling unable to put up boundaries, but now I have things look so much better and clearer. It's a gradual process. It's good you're in Therapy, that's got to help. I'd recommend sharing stories or concerns on this website, as a way to heal. So what do you see as the barriers between you putting up boundaries with your BPD ? What BPD behaviour do you find the most challenging ? 

[Sunfl0wer]

Hi there,

I just wanted to join Kwamina and HappyChappy in welcoming you to the site.

~Sunflower