BPDex keeping tabs during her new r/s

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hey all,

Is it common for BPDs to keep in contact with exes even while they are seeing someone else? BPDex and I broke up back in October after a 7 month r/s (included the usual idealization, devaluation, manipulative/controlling behaviors, mood swings, cheating, etc) Im aware of all the behaviors now and would NOT go for a recycle. However, she continues to "check in" on me via text or online chat even though she is in her new relationship. I usually just ignore the communique - but is this common for them? Is it just to keep exes on reserve in case they need them?

[goodguy]

Hey all,

Is it common for BPDs to keep in contact with exes even while they are seeing someone else? BPDex and I broke up back in October after a 7 month r/s (included the usual idealization, devaluation, manipulative/controlling behaviors, mood swings, cheating, etc) Im aware of all the behaviors now and would NOT go for a recycle. However, she continues to "check in" on me via text or online chat even though she is in her new relationship. I usually just ignore the communique - but is this common for them? Is it just to keep exes on reserve in case they need them?

[redfeather]

Yes it is very common. They need someone for a rainy day. 

[trouble11]

They have holes is their bucket.  I think even if they are thinking the new r/s is great and will last forever the contact with us tops off the bucket.