Thought I would share this with the board. I know it's best to ignore these emails. When do I ever do what is best for me?
I did spot the triggers that we both do to each other. I figure if this follows the historical path of the r/s of others on the board, I should be receiving a restraining order, right?
Don't you like how he starts out? No greeting, no explanation... .
Email from ex:
I got invited, last minute to run a relay. My part was only 5 miles. However, I had not done any road running for about 5 years. It showed. I had the second leg after an extremely fast first leg runner. He put me in some VERY fast company. I started out in 7th place out of about 800. I didn't finish my leg in 7th. Oh well, I completed my segment and did not have to walk (or lie dawn). I figured I did OK considering I did not train a single bit and went out cold-turkey.
Hope your weekend was good. I put down about 14 bags of bark on Sat. Thought of bags-o- bark at your house, and the big bark (the dog).
Have you looked-up Pastor XYZ and church? I guess he's here full time…
Regards,
Ex
Me:
Hey Sweetie,
Not sure why you are writing me…I’m confused. I don’t believe you have feelings towards me. Need help understanding why you are reaching out to me…?
Thanks,
Me
Ex:
Well, first and foremost, I think you are a good person. In my recent experience with folks in general since our "final", I have discovered that there are very few good people out there (very few).
Secondly, as result of my discoveries, I feel isolated and wanting to tell a good person what going on with me. Even though I understand that our differences caused our break-up, and in my case specifically, my laundry list of demons. I still value your opinion. However, having read your response, I realize my actions are self-serving and somewhat selfish. I am sorry. I will endeavor to stop and not contact you as best I can. I do care for you but as we have witnessed, not enough to significantly change into what you need from me.
Kind Regards,
Ex
Me:
You are a boundary breaker, not a big deal, more a part of your charm.
It’s interesting that at first we were soothing to each other’s core wounds and then we became triggers to each other’s core wounds. I needed a ‘daddy’ and you needed a ‘mommy’. Then we became the daddy/mommy that was so painful to both of us. We trigger each other.
Working hard on healing that core wound in me. A part of me wishes that we could of helped each other to heal.
I think though, now, I might be a determent to it, to your healing.
Ex:
You may well be right. I'm in the middle of healing some core in
[url=https://bpdfamily.com/content/communication-skills-validation]validation[/b][/url] and it has me thrashing around greatly. At times it hurts enough to shut me down.
I do not know what to do for sure, but maybe I am detrimental to your healing as well. I cause confusion at least. I will try and stop.
Me:
I hear you and I’m sorry you are dealing with these painful things…broken parents raise up broken children and the pattern repeats. Unless a person decides it’s time to break it.
Wishing you all the best.
Take care
