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Author Topic: not sure how to react or respond to this...  (Read 502 times)
hellokitty4
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« on: August 06, 2013, 10:08:56 AM »

My BPD friend dreamt last night that I was in a car accident.  She sent me a text telling me she had a weird dream and "don't be driving like a dork to work this morning." I just said ok.

Later she sent me this text "sometimes I wonder why I get aggravated so easily by silly things that involve you?" I know I am her weakness, her trigger but I didn't say anything other than "I'm not sure why that is." A lot of the time, no matter what I do, she will find something to get pissed with me about. I know I am always on her mind and in her idle times she somehow imagines things that I didn't even do but she believes I did. A no-win situation.

So what should I do or how do I respond to something like this? I can't exactly joke about the dream because she will instantly think I'm making fun of her instead of just making light of the dream... . afterall it is just a dream!
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MaybeSo
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« Reply #1 on: August 07, 2013, 08:48:29 AM »

If you have to say anything further at all, just validate that the dream was likely disturbing, and it makes sense that it would bother her. Just emotionally validate her experience. Dreams evoke feelings, and feelings equal facts to pwBPD.

(it probably triggered abandonment fears, fear that if you are driving recklessly you will get in an accident)
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Cloudy Days
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« Reply #2 on: August 07, 2013, 10:28:16 AM »

I've had dreams before that were really emotional, When I woke up I was really upset about it. So I can understand how someone with BPD would get really upset over a dream. In my dream my dog died in my arms, I immediately woke up and hugged her! My husband still has dreams that will upset him royally. Usually they are about me cheating on him, and again to him feelings equal facts. So he immediately says I'm cheating on him, because I did in his dream   Validation is what works best in this type of situation.
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