Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
May 01, 2025, 12:33:17 PM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Things we can't ignore
What Does it Take to Be in a Relationship
Why We Struggle in Our Relationships
Is Your Relationship Breaking Down?
Codependency and Codependent Relationships
93
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
> Topic:
not sure how to react or respond to this...
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: not sure how to react or respond to this... (Read 502 times)
hellokitty4
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 112
not sure how to react or respond to this...
«
on:
August 06, 2013, 10:08:56 AM »
My BPD friend dreamt last night that I was in a car accident. She sent me a text telling me she had a weird dream and "don't be driving like a dork to work this morning." I just said ok.
Later she sent me this text "sometimes I wonder why I get aggravated so easily by silly things that involve you?" I know I am her weakness, her trigger but I didn't say anything other than "I'm not sure why that is." A lot of the time, no matter what I do, she will find something to get pissed with me about. I know I am always on her mind and in her idle times she somehow imagines things that I didn't even do but she believes I did. A no-win situation.
So what should I do or how do I respond to something like this? I can't exactly joke about the dream because she will instantly think I'm making fun of her instead of just making light of the dream... . afterall it is just a dream!
Logged
PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.
MaybeSo
Distinguished Member
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Together five years, ended suddenly June 2011
Posts: 3680
Players only love you when they're playing...
Re: not sure how to react or respond to this...
«
Reply #1 on:
August 07, 2013, 08:48:29 AM »
If you have to say anything further at all, just validate that the dream was likely disturbing, and it makes sense that it would bother her. Just emotionally validate her experience. Dreams evoke feelings, and feelings equal facts to pwBPD.
(it probably triggered abandonment fears, fear that if you are driving recklessly you will get in an accident)
Logged
Cloudy Days
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 1095
Re: not sure how to react or respond to this...
«
Reply #2 on:
August 07, 2013, 10:28:16 AM »
I've had dreams before that were really emotional, When I woke up I was really upset about it. So I can understand how someone with BPD would get really upset over a dream. In my dream my dog died in my arms, I immediately woke up and hugged her! My husband still has dreams that will upset him royally. Usually they are about me cheating on him, and again to him feelings equal facts. So he immediately says I'm cheating on him, because I did in his dream Validation is what works best in this type of situation.
Logged
It's not the future you are afraid of, it's repeating the past that makes you anxious.
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
> Topic:
not sure how to react or respond to this...
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...