First Thoughts

[emotionaholic]

It has been 6 weeks now of NC.  I am doing much better in the last 2 weeks with my depression and missing her.  But the one thing I can not get a handle on and work on is the time right when I am waking up and not in control of my thought process yet.  My first thoughts out of dream state are her.  Not necessarily a longing for or reliving an argument or conversation, just her.  A random experience we shared, picture of her in my head, nothing intense or sexual, almost like a simple good morning from her.  I wish my subconscious and my conscious would work together on this one.  Its starting to piss me off.

[heartandwhole]

That is so frustrating.  I remember during a vacation right after my breakup that I spent practically the entire day immobile, letting thoughts swirl in my head - it was astounding how much was going on in there. I had never experienced that before.

What I can say is that with time, it will change.  I didn't think it would, but it did, and I feel so much better.

One step at a time.  At six weeks, it sounds like you are doing really well. 

[Vindi]

glad you made 6 mos... . and yes, i think first thing in the morning is always the hardest, b4 your day even starts, thoughts linger thru your mind.

Try to change the focus on yourself, what YOU are going to be doing that day, make plans keep busy and in time the thoughts of her will lessen.