Texts/calls received since she left.

[Depression = 72% of members]

My exUBPDgf left me the second time on July 12.

Since then, I have received a few strange texts and calls from numbers I do not recognize.

July 27... . I receive a call from a "00000000" number around 11 in morning. I do not answer it.

An hour later, I receive a text from an out of state number(I live in NY) that I do not recognize. Somehow the area code of the number seems familiar.

The text itself was in the form of what appeared to be "spam" about registering for a family name and what not.

I found it odd that I would get a "spam" text from an out of state area code. I don't reply to it.

Something about the area code looked oddly familiar though.

I decide to actually look at my exUBPDgf cell number(I don't have it memorized)... . just to make sure.

She lives in outskirts of Boston.

When I checked her number... . The area codes were identical.

My mind begins to race.

The text is in the form of spam.

I google that number that texted me.

On web page that found the number, a map is shown locating exactly where it originated from.

Her exact county appears listed on it.

On the map itself, it originated from 3 blocks from her house address.

It is not spam.

No one else from there besides her has my number that I knowingly gave to.

The text was sent in the disguise of spam from possibly a family member/friend of hers phone.

Most likely to see if I changed my number since I went NC.

That 0000000 number that called me an hour before that text was most likely from her too.

On August 28, a month after that text... . At 2 am I receive a text from a local number in NY that I do not recognize.

It says "hey"

I do not respond.

I give out my number rarely. So I know who I give it out to.

At 2:26 am, I receive another text from that same number.

It says "Gke"

I do not respond.

The letter G is first initial of my name and what people who know me would sometimes call me by.

I do not know who that number is from.

I did not receive any texts like that while I was with her.

Somehow I believe it is connected to her... . She has close family/ friends in NY.

A day before that, I received a missed call from another local number that I do not recognize.

I do not answer.

When she left me first time and was NC for 3 months... . She stalked me entire time.

Watched my Facebook activity from fake account.

Called a few times from a "private" number and left silent voicemails/ and would stay silent when I picked up phone.

She confirmed it with me that it was her when I let her back in my life.

I fear this will continue.

I am not healed.

Her previous behavior is a strong indicator of this.

[Ironmanrises]

My exUBPDgf left me the second time on July 12.

Since then, I have received a few strange texts and calls from numbers I do not recognize.

July 27... . I receive a call from a "00000000" number around 11 in morning. I do not answer it.

An hour later, I receive a text from an out of state number(I live in NY) that I do not recognize. Somehow the area code of the number seems familiar.

The text itself was in the form of what appeared to be "spam" about registering for a family name and what not.

I found it odd that I would get a "spam" text from an out of state area code. I don't reply to it.

Something about the area code looked oddly familiar though.

I decide to actually look at my exUBPDgf cell number(I don't have it memorized)... . just to make sure.

She lives in outskirts of Boston.

When I checked her number... . The area codes were identical.

My mind begins to race.

The text is in the form of spam.

I google that number that texted me.

On web page that found the number, a map is shown locating exactly where it originated from.

Her exact county appears listed on it.

On the map itself, it originated from 3 blocks from her house address.

It is not spam.

No one else from there besides her has my number that I knowingly gave to.

The text was sent in the disguise of spam from possibly a family member/friend of hers phone.

Most likely to see if I changed my number since I went NC.

That 0000000 number that called me an hour before that text was most likely from her too.

On August 28, a month after that text... . At 2 am I receive a text from a local number in NY that I do not recognize.

It says "hey"

I do not respond.

I give out my number rarely. So I know who I give it out to.

At 2:26 am, I receive another text from that same number.

It says "Gke"

I do not respond.

The letter G is first initial of my name and what people who know me would sometimes call me by.

I do not know who that number is from.

I did not receive any texts like that while I was with her.

Somehow I believe it is connected to her... . She has close family/ friends in NY.

A day before that, I received a missed call from another local number that I do not recognize.

I do not answer.

When she left me first time and was NC for 3 months... . She stalked me entire time.

Watched my Facebook activity from fake account.

Called a few times from a "private" number and left silent voicemails/ and would stay silent when I picked up phone.

She confirmed it with me that it was her when I let her back in my life.

I fear this will continue.

I am not healed.

Her previous behavior is a strong indicator of this.

[fromheeltoheal]

The good news is there will come a time when you'll get a little amused, and mostly indifferent, to calls and texts like that.  In the meantime focus on you and delete, delete, delete.

[Ironmanrises]

From heal,

I have maintained my NC entire time.

I haven't tried to reach out to her or anything.

My Facebook and Instagram I permanently closed since the day she left me for second time.

I can't change my number because it would require an explanation to my parents/other family members that I do not wish to even know of what reason lies behind that.

It would make matters far worse for me.

That day when I will be indifferent to this seems a century away.

This behavior of hers and me giving into it the last time is what got me in the hell that I am in.

I was doing fine towards latter part oft NC first time she left.

Things are far worse for me this time around.

My radio silence continues.

[Learning_curve74]

I can't change my number because it would require an explanation to my parents/other family members that I do not wish to even know of what reason lies behind that.

It would make matters far worse for me.

While I usually believe honesty is the best policy, could you change numbers and just lie to them about why? Tell them some bill collectors got the wrong number and won't stop calling you? Or somebody you don't know keeps calling and texting you so much it's annoying? This second excuse isn't even lying because you don't really know who exactly is calling or texting.

[Ironmanrises]

Learning,

I know what you are saying.

It would be that I know that I am lying... . I want to maintain some sense of order.

I've let myself get entangled in this web of carnage and sadness as it is.

[fromheeltoheal]

I'm sure you thought of this already, but you can block specific phone numbers from being able to call or text you.  That won't work if she uses other people's phones obviously, but at least it's something.

It took me the better part of a year NC to get completely detached emotionally, and about 8 months after I left, on our anniversary, which was obviously not a coincidence, she sent me an email that I should have deleted unread, but I read it.  I felt really good that I had learned enough about BPD by then to read right through what she'd written, but just reading it sent me into a tailspin for a while, and set back my recovery.  You probably know this, and said you got sucked back in yourself, but it is critical to eliminate all possible channels while you heal.  Good luck and stay strong!

[Ironmanrises]

Fromheel,

A year of NC... . That is really long.

8 months to emotionally detach... . Almost 2 years total.

I can only imagine how maddening and hurtful an experience that must have been.

I am so sorry.

I have an app on my phone that blocks numbers/texts... . more like quarantine them.

If she changes her number though, renders my block useless.

Her previous behavior included calling from private numbers and what not.

Which also renders my block useless.

My biggest portal to get to me was through Facebook and Instagram which I used to use quite extensively.

The portal to both has been sealed, I closed both accounts permanently.

My close friends are not thrilled that I sacrificed that aspect of my life.

I am trying to protect myself, they don't understand that.

I can no longer explain it to them why I am forced to do that.

By closing that portal, she has no idea whatsoever of my whereabouts/info on me.