So, she said to me at work yesterday , " you never smile anymore, you are so serious. smile more" and mentioned that it was her son's birthday. Trust me, I payed little attention to her yesterday, but those two comments hit me. After work we texted (it was like I was in a zone where I had been completely seduce). We talked about hanging out again etc... .Later, when I came to my senses I backed out.
This is so hard. This girl is absolutely gorgeous and her voice is so alluring. I have been going to my therapist twice a week, which really helps.
Honestly, I am not mad at myself. I have found the compassionate side of me and realize that I long to be with someone, who is caring, pretty, loving, etc. That isn't her though, but she sure as hell can make it seem that way.
I
'd because of the bold part. She said that word for word. It was after something she'd done. I didn't want to pretend nothing had happened. She felt and noticed that.
And that was exactly what she said afterwards :-P :-(
