Validation

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

After I sent a poem on Saturday, I noticed today on my statcounter that he (it was an IP address I had definitively identified as him back when we were still talking, no question about it this time) spent over a half hour combing through a blog I hardly ever update in the wee hours yesterday. Poor guy, I guess it sent him spinning.

[UmbrellaBoy]

After I sent a poem on Saturday, I noticed today on my statcounter that he (it was an IP address I had definitively identified as him back when we were still talking, no question about it this time) spent over a half hour combing through a blog I hardly ever update in the wee hours yesterday. Poor guy, I guess it sent him spinning.

[Ironmanrises]

Dont be surprised if he attempts to reach out to you. If/when this happens, what will you do?

[UmbrellaBoy]

Depends what he says, I suppose.

Though if he were going to contact, wouldn't it have been right away after him reading all those blog posts ?

[damage control]

UB:

I could be wrong here as your post is very brief and I don't fully know what you are asking but  ... .

I get the sense that you are hoping the poem struck a chord in him and that he will reach out to you, hoping that it'sent him spinning - hoping that it had some measurable effect ... .is this the case?

And why 'poor guy? Are you thinking that he is hurting/regretful of what he did?

[GreenMango]

Umbrella he may be trying to make sense of the you and the  poem - you mentioned it was kind of cryptic - like you are trying make sense of him and him trailing you.

It sounds like you might have thrown out that email to get a reaction.  Where to from here if he doesn't respond?

[Ironmanrises]

Logic would dictate that he would respond right after reading your blog updates, his disorder, however, will steer him to try and translate everything you wrote. And the distorted thinking is probably going haywire trying to make sense of it. He may even think you are attacking him(even if your blog posts are of the opposite nature for example). If/when he does respond to you, it will be in a way to expose himself to the least amount of "possible" rejection from you. Possible as in perceived through that distorted lens.

[UmbrellaBoy]

Well now I feel terrible. Turns out (I just found out randomly checking his cousin's facebook; he himself has me blocked) his grandfather died that morning, the morning after he randomly was combing through my blog.

Originally I thought the grandfather died the morning BEFORE he was checking my blog (which would have made me feel really awful), but it turns out he died the morning AFTER he was checking my blog. Still, I'm sure they must have known it was imminent for at least a few days beforehand (unless it just happened suddenly at home), and now I feel like an ass.

[Ironmanrises]

My condolences for your ex's loss. I can understand you feeling terrible, but there was no way for you to know that since you have been NC with him for some time now.