Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
September 28, 2024, 06:33:17 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits. Practicing lawyer, Senior Family Mediator, and former Licensed Clinical Social Worker with twelve years’ experience and an expert on navigating the Family Court process.
222
Pages: [1]   Go Down
« previous next »
  Print  
Author Topic: Needless suffering  (Read 467 times)
Perfidy
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Divorced/18 years Single/5 months that I know of.
Posts: 1594
« on: January 09, 2014, 10:50:55 PM »
Years? Really? I am almost there. I know I haven't detached completely. I'm very close. It's been almost ten months. I get it now. I cared. It meant a lot to me. I loved her. I would have gone to hell and back for her. I would have given my life if it would have made a difference.

THAT WAS ME. I'm good with that. I did the best I could and I'm a caring, loving person. Guess how I figured this out. If you can't guess pm me and I'll tell you. It seems to be a big secret. The relief... . It's like having a fence post taken out of my a$$. 
Logged
myself
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 3151
« Reply #1 on: January 09, 2014, 11:37:54 PM »
You admitted it, accepted it, and felt ahhh?
Logged
Perfidy
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Divorced/18 years Single/5 months that I know of.
Posts: 1594
« Reply #2 on: January 09, 2014, 11:50:42 PM »
I'm accepting it. It feels good. Fn life goes on
Logged
Perfidy
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Divorced/18 years Single/5 months that I know of.
Posts: 1594
« Reply #3 on: January 10, 2014, 12:47:37 AM »
Quote from: myself on January 09, 2014, 11:37:54 PM
You admitted it, accepted it, and felt ahhh?

Pretty much
Logged
seeking balance
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Relationship status: divorced
Posts: 7146
« Reply #4 on: January 10, 2014, 12:49:11 AM »
Quote from: Perfidy on January 09, 2014, 11:50:42 PM
life goes on

yep, it certainly does  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)
Logged
Faith does not grow in the house of certainty - The Shack
Perfidy
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Divorced/18 years Single/5 months that I know of.
Posts: 1594
« Reply #5 on: January 10, 2014, 12:52:24 AM »
Quote from: seeking balance on January 10, 2014, 12:49:11 AM
Quote from: Perfidy on January 09, 2014, 11:50:42 PM
life goes on

yep, it certainly does  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)

[/quote

It's a choice. I know where I'm coming from.
Logged
Perfidy
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Divorced/18 years Single/5 months that I know of.
Posts: 1594
« Reply #6 on: January 10, 2014, 12:53:35 AM »
Lets go into the desert, and party!
Logged
heartandwhole
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 3592
« Reply #7 on: January 10, 2014, 10:45:35 AM »
You realized that you are much more than this body/mind thing that moves in space, that nothing can touch your inherent perfection, that your true nature transcends thought, feeling, and physical pleasure/pain, all the while expressing the infinite creativity in each of those ways?   Smiling (click to insert in post)

C'mon perfidy, give us the carrot! 


Logged
When the pain of love increases your joy, roses and lilies fill the garden of your soul.
Perfidy
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Divorced/18 years Single/5 months that I know of.
Posts: 1594
« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2014, 11:34:27 AM »
Problems and solutions. Stay in the problem or find the solution. A choice.

Getting her completely out of my life is the solution. The rest will take care of itself.
Logged
heartandwhole
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 3592
« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2014, 01:09:41 PM »
Quote from: Perfidy on January 10, 2014, 11:34:27 AM
Problems and solutions. Stay in the problem or find the solution. A choice.

Getting her completely out of my life is the solution. The rest will take care of itself.

I like that!  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)
Logged
When the pain of love increases your joy, roses and lilies fill the garden of your soul.
babyspook

*
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Seperated
Posts: 45
« Reply #10 on: January 10, 2014, 01:21:25 PM »
Quote from: Perfidy on January 10, 2014, 11:34:27 AM
Problems and solutions. Stay in the problem or find the solution. A choice.

Getting her completely out of my life is the solution. The rest will take care of itself.

Agreed!  I came to that conclusion a while back.  I even backed off quite a bit from visiting this site so much because I'd find myself glued to it at times, reading everyone else's horror stories and re-experiencing their misery all over again.  It kinda made me feel like I was back there again.  That's not moving forward.
Logged
myself
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 3151
« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2014, 02:12:44 PM »
Glad to hear it, Perfidy. I am in the same kind of boat, finding more acceptance every day. It's encouraging to know there's land in sight.
Logged
Perfidy
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Divorced/18 years Single/5 months that I know of.
Posts: 1594
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2014, 02:26:38 PM »
Myself, exactly. Land in sight. Rumination=depression. Never understood this until recently.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
BPDFamily.com > Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) > Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship > Topic: Needless suffering
 « previous next »
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife


Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!