Projection?

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

Dropped into se my exGF BPD a while back at her work.

She said I was just like my farther, but I had some good qualities... .

My farther is co-dependant on my mother... .her farther is a narcissist who mentally abused her as a child including 6 years of silent treatment when she was 15 and always said she was fat... .W@NKER

Anyway... .would this be a classic case of projection?

She went on to say... .basically its all my fault we broke up and who knows maybe we might get back together one day... .

[Flora73]

Dropped into se my exGF BPD a while back at her work.

She said I was just like my farther, but I had some good qualities... .

My farther is co-dependant on my mother... .her farther is a narcissist who mentally abused her as a child including 6 years of silent treatment when she was 15 and always said she was fat... .W@NKER

Anyway... .would this be a classic case of projection?

She went on to say... .basically its all my fault we broke up and who knows maybe we might get back together one day... .

[AwakenedOne]

She went on to say... .basically its all my fault we broke up and who knows maybe we might get back together one day... .

The most valuable thing I ever learned at this site is that BPD "love" isn't love. It's NEED. The above statement screams out in support of that fact. You will be only called if she needs you. You are at fault for everything but that doesn't stop her from her needs being met by the best candidate. Considering she ignored you for 7 weeks like you don't exist I wouldn't hold your breath. Do you want to live like that? I did but I refuse to ever again. My kind advice to you is find a healthy girl. Good luck my friend.

[Flora73]

Thank you AwakenedOne

I have put myself in a position where I',m in NC.

Should she come around again, Im going to ask her to look at help. if not I'm done.

But my questions was: whether her statement was projection.

Thank you again.

[Mutt]

My farther is co-dependant on my mother... .her farther is a narcissist who mentally abused her as a child including 6 years of silent treatment when she was 15 and always said she was fat... .W@NKER

I'm not sure why she said this. A little backstory may help. Did she make you feel guilty in the past by associating you with him?

She went on to say... .basically its all my fault we broke up and who knows maybe we might get back together one day... .

This is projection. It takes two. She projected her negative feelings and attributes for her failures in the r/s. I'm sorry.

[Flora73]

Thank you Mutt.

No never said anything about my farther... .ever.

But was very clear about how horrible her farther was and to the point where she still has body issues due to his snide remarks to the day... .she is 50