Hi isadesesperada
I would like to join
Turkish in welcoming you here
BPD is quite a challenging disorder and having a BPD sister can be difficult indeed. Has your sister been officially diagnosed with BPD or any other disorder? Has she ever been in therapy to deal with her issues?
What lead up to this current situation in which your sister is experiencing financial difficulties?
You say she demands your help and gets abusive. I am very sorry to hear that, being abused by a family-member you are usually close too isn't easy. In what ways is your sister abusive towards you? Perhaps you will benefit from reading an article we have on here about fear, obligation and guilt (FOG). Here's an excerpt:
... .fear, obligation or guilt ("FOG" are the transactional dynamics at play between the controller and the person being controlled. Understanding these dynamics are useful to anyone trying to extricate themselves from the controlling behavior by another person and deal with their own compulsions to do things that are uncomfortable, undesirable, burdensome, or self-sacrificing for others.
Do you feel like your sister uses fear, obligation and/or guilt to get you to help her out financially? And do you feel comfortable setting and enforcing boundaries with your sister? You can read the entire article about FOG here if you're interested:
Emotional Blackmail: Fear, Obligation and Guilt (FOG)
