BPD parent gone, nonBPD parent ignoring

[beefree]

My BPD parent passed away recently... .my nonBPD parent had contact with me while I was in town for a week for the passing & funeral, and during the days after that I stayed to help cleaning up the house... .but has completely ignored any and all contact since dropping me at the airport to fly home... .texts, calls, and facebook messages.

In a very real sense, I had greived my loss of relationships with both parents a year ago... .but seeing and interacting with the nonBPD had given me hope of restoring that relationship... .my emotions are churning and feeling abandoned all over again. :*( 

[Kwamina]

Hi beefree

I still remember your last post in which you talked about your mother's passing. I am very sorry for your loss. Though she had BPD, she was still your mother of course and losing a close family-member is never easy.

Being ignored like this by your own father is very unpleasant, especially in this time of mourning.

How was the contact between you and your dad in those days that you stayed there after your mother's funeral?

[Woolspinner2000]

Hi Beefree,

Let me first offer a   for you. I'm sorry about the loss of your mom. I lost my uBPDm 3 years ago this month, and it is never an easy thing. No words can really express what you feel when a parent passes, even if the relationship was difficult. I hardly knew my stepdad when she passed, and while it has been a slow walk to get to know him better, with time my relationship with him has grown and we now talk about my mom. I just came back from FL, and for the first time I mentioned BPD to him. He was quite receptive, and the door is cracking open a little more each time I visit. So my hope for you is that with time, there will be the chance for you to re-establish what you can with your nonBPD parent. You are all grieving right now. Allow yourself time for that, and know that everyone processes grief differently. I was exhausted for months, weighed down with grief and sadness.

How are you managing self care right now?

 Wools