Strugglled with no conctact but pushed through

[StandingTall]

I struggled with no contact now i fear it... .I found out from a close friend my wxBPD x fiancée left my replacement... .in the end I got no satisfaction by that because inside myself i knew what would happen... .he was my friend of 25 years I'll pray for him but that line was crossed ... .I fear she will try to contact me. ... I will continue on my path of self improvement... .everyone out there who's hurting  we need to let go and love ourselves... .you have the ability to feel better just don't contact them and become an addict of self improvement ... .remember days will be good an days will be bad but your life is worth living and you are better off... .Happy friday i encourage u to read my story ... .take all the time you need but focus that time on you!

[Suzn]

I fear she will try to contact me.

What is it you fear will happen if she contacts you?

[StandingTall]

I only fear stepping back in to a future that once felt so clear... .I have stated before... .I once made a promise to myself to be honest adn true to my feelings... .I never knew how clouded one could get when you are presented with  an ideal  that challenges a sense of reality. What i thought and saw  as important  in life was wrong. ... the clear pictured was railroared in  a fashion cruelly dishonorably  presented either by a mirror or a facade of a person i did not know. ... knowledge truest to the most perfect human could not satisfy a person as empty empty as who i thought was a soulmate ... .therfore what scares me is the unknown... the unknown of my reality under this new experience, the unknown  of where I find my place in my heart... .the unknown  of living and leaving, or hurting or loving... .but the most scary part is that it's my future in my hands and to be honesty the unknown scares me but it also is exciting ... .which means to everyone, we will all be fine... .don't sacrifice  the capacity to love because we once were hurt... .stop take responsibilty in your true self abd god bless because it will all be ok i promise