Nightmares rearing their ugly head - I need some help

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

Hi friends -

I've been divorced from uxhwBPD for over two and a half years. Recently, I've been having nightmares about the relationship. Pretty frequent ones. Where I experience the fear of him again, and basically I do not feel safe. I wake up and it stays with me throughout the day.

I want to talk to my boyfriend about it, but I don't want him to think that I am having these dreams because I have any soft feelings for my ex. I absolutely do not. I think of my x as a horrible mistake, one that I have paid dearly for.

I'm wondering if it is PTSD, I'm wondering if it is just my brain trying to help me work through the trauma.

If anyone has had these dreams could you please tell me what you did to stop them, or how long I should expect to be dealing with the after effects of that miserable relationship.

Thank you so much,

L

[love4meNOTu]

Hi friends -

I've been divorced from uxhwBPD for over two and a half years. Recently, I've been having nightmares about the relationship. Pretty frequent ones. Where I experience the fear of him again, and basically I do not feel safe. I wake up and it stays with me throughout the day.

I want to talk to my boyfriend about it, but I don't want him to think that I am having these dreams because I have any soft feelings for my ex. I absolutely do not. I think of my x as a horrible mistake, one that I have paid dearly for.

I'm wondering if it is PTSD, I'm wondering if it is just my brain trying to help me work through the trauma.

If anyone has had these dreams could you please tell me what you did to stop them, or how long I should expect to be dealing with the after effects of that miserable relationship.

Thank you so much,

L

[bdyw8]

Hi there, yes I experience all the same thing.  Vivid dreams about the emotional abuse and being ignored and dumped over and over again.  I wake up screaming and sweating and crying sometimes too.  It's horrible.  For me, my psychiatrist and psychologist have both said these are strong PTSD symptoms.   But normal, none the less, part of the healing process too I think.

Counselling and talking to others about this helps.  Good for your for opening up about this.  You're not alone.  I believe they come and go in phases.  I will go a few days having the dreams, then a few days without them. 

For me, I find that if I do some real prayer and meditation before bed to really calm my mind, it helps put me in a better head space for my sleep.