A few months later, hope is real and it does get better

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

Hi All

It has been a while since I lasted posted on this forum but wanted to give you an update.

I have been NC with my exGF for over 2 months and we have been split for over 3 now. The first month and a bit was really hard and I did not think I would be able to do it and she was always finding a reason to get the wounds fresh by contacting me.

Fast forward to now, I am happier and I have gotten all my friends back I lost being in such a controlling and damaging relationship. I have also recently met another girl, someone who makes and effort for me, cares for me and wants to get to know me and get closer to me but at a normal pace. She has a job and responsibilities, is level headed and happy.

My life is so much better than it was. My advice to anyone that is going through it recently would be to really go NC if you can. They win by pulling you in and keeping you attached to them in some way even if at the same time they are with someone else.

Once you have cut ties (if you have kids REALLY limit the contact) you can really start to heal and work on you. From there you can rebuild your life.

Time really is a healer but more importantly you are the one that has to move yourself forward and you can only do that by letting go of the weight of your ex.

Good luck all!

[kyon147]

Hi All

It has been a while since I lasted posted on this forum but wanted to give you an update.

I have been NC with my exGF for over 2 months and we have been split for over 3 now. The first month and a bit was really hard and I did not think I would be able to do it and she was always finding a reason to get the wounds fresh by contacting me.

Fast forward to now, I am happier and I have gotten all my friends back I lost being in such a controlling and damaging relationship. I have also recently met another girl, someone who makes and effort for me, cares for me and wants to get to know me and get closer to me but at a normal pace. She has a job and responsibilities, is level headed and happy.

My life is so much better than it was. My advice to anyone that is going through it recently would be to really go NC if you can. They win by pulling you in and keeping you attached to them in some way even if at the same time they are with someone else.

Once you have cut ties (if you have kids REALLY limit the contact) you can really start to heal and work on you. From there you can rebuild your life.

Time really is a healer but more importantly you are the one that has to move yourself forward and you can only do that by letting go of the weight of your ex.

Good luck all!

[kc sunshine]

Thanks so much Kyon for your words of hope and inspiration!

[Feelinstronger]

Thank you for such a hopeful post.  I am 5 weeks into a final (8 total) breakup and only a few days ago did I begin to feel slightly alright. ANd I have an elderly dad and three teen daughters to raise, along with a full time job.  Its been awful to have my energy and productivity come to a screeching halt.  SO, I wish for you more healing and happiness and I hope that perhaps in a few months that I may be in a position to post a hopeful update, too.