Does anyone have experience with 9 year old Bpd children?

[Bpdchild]

I have a 9 year old very possibly Bpd boy in my family.
No abuse situation. Mother is mildly bipolar. In my observation not normal behavior started when he was 3 and younger brother was born. He never outgrew age retlated behavior like tamper tantrums. Other problems occur as he grows older.
Does anyone have experience with evaluations and treatment of young children?
thanks

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Gorges]

We saw early signs with our daughter that she was intense and made poor choices.  I think a great approach for younger children is the Nurtured Heart Approach.  BPD is not diagnosed in children.  I thought it was not diagnosed in teenagers but it seems that people here have had their teenagers diagnosed so I am not sure.

I think all of these things come under the category "difficult" "intense" "dysregulated" that is what I liked about NHA.

[473harman]

not exactly - but - my 16 year has diagnosed BPD (currently in therapeutic boarding school) and her 7 year old sister has so much dysregulation and anxiety that we are taking it very seriously. She sees her sister's former DBT therapist to learn how to accept her emotions and not hide or rage because of them. I highly recommend early intervention if you believe it is BPD - I cannot tell you what a horrible illness it can turn into if not treated correctly.
Best of luck

[livednlearned]

My son was assessed as "at risk" when he was 9, then dx'd ODD, ADHD/ADD combined type, anxiety + depression at age 10. His father is bipolar II and likely has a PD (BPD/NPD), so there is likely a genetic component, although having a disordered father certainly played a role.

I found Blaise Aguirre's book on BPD in Adolescence to be very helpful. If your child has emerging traits, it's good to know what the gold standard is, and Aguirre is probably the leading expert on BPD in kids.

Trust your instincts, if you think something is out of the ordinary, it is. Keep looking for a doctor/counselor who helps you.

You may also want to read books about the "highly-sensitive child." My son has some sensory defensiveness that I completely misread when he was a child, and realized late that he needed different kinds of responses than what I provided.

And books on validation, those are important. Kids with strong emotions need to know that their emotions are ok so that they don't feel totally isolated on top of feeling different. If you can validate how they feel and acknowledge and accept that the feelings are ok, then you can help focus them and guide them toward more appropriate behaviors.

Again, trust yourself. You know something is off, and will need to advocate for your child. I tell myself that my son is high needs because he has so many things going on -- he's not special needs in the way that labels go, but his needs are certainly special and responding to him that way has helped tame the dragons to an extent that he is responding to therapy and making progress.