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VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?" Parental alienation is when a parent allows a child to participate or hear them degrade the other parent. This is not uncommon in divorces and the children often adjust. In severe cases, however, it can be devastating to the child. This video provides a helpful overview.
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Author Topic: He wants to have sex  (Read 351 times)
anna58
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Posts: 143


« on: January 03, 2017, 03:36:05 AM »

Ok, on occasion, I read his emails. He is living with me and considers me a friend but really just needs a place to live. And we sometimes have dated or been close physically. He likes to attach without attaching. Ugh.

So, he has asked for sex a couple times recently. And when I looked at his email with the woman in Germany who he spent a year with, he tells her he loves her.  He has been with me for 6 years and never said or wrote me that. I feel so goddamn used. I am so angry at him.

I am moving in 2-3 weeks, so that will be that. But he is living here and not sure where to move. Maybe back to Germany, which I bet he does. He lied about and hid that relationship from me for a couple years. The ass.

He is a narcissist with no sense of self unless it is defined by someone else, or he is chasing after someone or something that makes him feel like a star. In the meantime, I am moving into a cheap low-rent apartment because I am poor. 

Ok, that is my venting. I know I am headed in the right direction and need strength these next two weeks.

But what is up with him wanting sex? He can't say a nice thing about me.

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JohnLove
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 571



« Reply #1 on: January 03, 2017, 06:47:47 AM »

Methinks... .it's all about them, unfortunately. 
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Hisaccount
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: divorced
Posts: 336


« Reply #2 on: January 03, 2017, 07:27:51 AM »

Very sorry to hear that. It does sound like he is just using you.

These people only think of themselves. He will continue to use you as long as you let him.
I am glad you are getting out.

They can be so nice, warm, and friendly when they need something from us. Too bad it is a game and we all learn too late.
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anna58
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« Reply #3 on: January 05, 2017, 10:24:04 PM »

Thanks for the understanding responses. Yes, I am being used. It is creeping me out because he has no feelings about leaving. He is friendly and confides in me and we spend time together. But it doesn't add up to meaning anything to him. He is just going on his way.

And this other woman. I am jealous. Because I think he loves her but he will not stay with her and has told her so. But she accepts it. Or says she does. She has figured out a way to get him back there. She is taking out a loan for him so he can afford to be there. Really sick.

He changes his beliefs every second---he can't go because he feels like a "kept" man. Oh, he is going because she has taken out a loan for him.

My question is this: What can I say to him to let him know that I am pissed out and feel used and he has no feelings?

If I say anything, I will look like the one who is wrong or bad somehow. I hate that.

Thank you!
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