From the Four Agreements

[Beware of Junk Psychology...]

"If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you.  If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her.  Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal.  Then you can choose what you really want.  You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices."

-- Don Miguel Ruiz

I like this quotation, which seems particularly apt to a BPD r/s.

LuckyJim

The Four Agreements Author: Don Miguel Ruiz Publisher: Amber-Allen Publishing 1997 Paperback: 168 pages ISBN-10: 1878424505 ISBN-13: 9781878424501

[Lucky Jim]

"If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you.  If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her.  Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal.  Then you can choose what you really want.  You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices."

-- Don Miguel Ruiz

I like this quotation, which seems particularly apt to a BPD r/s.

LuckyJim

The Four Agreements Author: Don Miguel Ruiz Publisher: Amber-Allen Publishing 1997 Paperback: 168 pages ISBN-10: 1878424505 ISBN-13: 9781878424501

[gotbushels]

I like this quotation LuckyJim. Thank you. 

Yes, it can be seen as a gift when people who are not loving and not respectful walk away from you. I agree, that can be a way to help you choose what you really want, or with whom you want to spend your time with. 

[Lucky Jim]

thanks, gotbushels.  I would probably add one thing to this quotation, which is that if someone is treating you unkindly, with a lack of respect, it's a gift to yourself if you walk away from him/her, particularly after "many years of suffering."

LJ

[Panda39]

Thanks for sharing this, it definitely resonates with me... .Ms. Codependent (no more ).  It is a lesson I learned the hard way.

Panda39

[Lucky Jim]

It is a lesson I learned the hard way.

Panda39:  that is an apt description for much of my marriage to my BPDxW!  LJ