Anxious Attachment Style and BPD

[mama-wolf]

In the couples therapy session with my uBPDw last week, our T took us through a small survey so that we could start exploring our attachment styles.  My attachment style came up as "Avoidant" (not a surprise to me after reading more information about this), and my uBPDw's came up as "Anxious."

As I have done some digging into this topic and focused in particular on the Anxious attachment style, I have developed some questions that I'm going to try to articulate here.  I'm not completely sure how to ask what I want to ask, but my thoughts center on the following:

1) What is the correlation between Anxious attachment style and BPD traits?
2) How likely is it that one is mistaken for the other?  (does that really matter?)
3) Is there a causal relationship between the Anxious attachment style and BPD?  Or did they likely come from the same source?
4) Many of the resultant behaviors from both the Anxious attachment style and BPD seem to be very similar... .so will/would treatment be the same?  And would it be as effective for either issue?

I'm really only at the beginning of exploring this topic, and am hoping someone here can help shed light on the subject and/or point me in the direction of some additional resources.  I need and want to understand my uBPDw better.  Our marriage is very likely going to end, but we are co-parents and will be in each other's lives for a very long time. 

I am also extremely focused on ensuring that her parenting of our children does not create problems for them, which has already started with D9 in a big way.  D9 has been exhibiting serious issues with emotional regulation, especially in any circumstance when she has to interact with uBPDw.  She has started to develop body image issues, which I feel is the result of constant correction by uBPDw, and she is convinced no one likes her.  There are other issues too, and we have her in therapy to start addressing them all.  I'm just terrified that she's headed down a BPD path and that it could be because of uBPDw's mental health issues.

mw

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[lostandconfused6]

I have questions about this too i have just begun looking into reactive attachment disorder today and the different types and causes of it... .to me my BPDbf has symptoms of both... .i was also told in adults it is considered BPD or other personality disorders such as NPD but i feel there must be some distinction and differences between them

[Skip]

Do you think anxious attachment style and fear of abandonment are related/similar?

[mama-wolf]

Skip, in my non-clinical opinion, I’d say without a doubt yes.  But that’s why I pose the question here.  Related is one thing... .correlation and causality are another... .

mw