He’s in treatment... but he just hit me... again

[Scarletlavender]

My husband was recently diagnosed with BPD and is in therapy - but it has been over 25 years struggling with this without knowing. I’m incredibly proud of him for getting into treatment, but it has not seemed to get that much better after 3 months.  He’s had a boardeRAGE incident every 6 days for the past 3 weeks and yesterday he hit me.  Not the first time. I feel really lost and alone and angry and depressed and hopeless.  I know he’s fragile, but there’s a big part of me that feels like he never has consequences for his actions because he can always blame BPD and it’s “not him.” If I threaten to leave, he’ll either hurt me or himself and I don’t want to leave him (so I don’t want to lie).
First post - need advise.

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[Ozling]

I have no advice and I hope a more experienced moderator/member sees your post but I do have a question if you don't mind - Does his therapist know about the hitting/physical abuse? 

I'm so sorry you are going through this.  I feel like these processes (like therapy) usually get worse before they get better. 

Do you have your own therapist?  What does your support system look like? 

Ginormous hugs to you!  You are not alone.