Should I confront BPD ex?

[HealingTee]

Is it a good idea to confront a BPD ex about all the hurt they caused you? Currently feeling angry and and feel the need to confront ex and tell him off.

[Couper]

Absolutely not.  If justice is what you seek, you will not get it.  By doing so you will be feeding into the narrative that caused the injustice you desire to rectify to start all over again.  If you're free, learn from it and move on and know that the never-ending disfunction that a BPD has to live with daily is far more punishment than anything you could ever dole-out.

 

[Rex31807]

I agree. They will only project their anger upon you. Also, if they haven't been violent in the past there is a good chance they can become so. I was on the receiving end of the violence and with you being a woman you need to be careful and not put yourself in that type of situation.

They will live their life in misery. That is far worse punishment than anything you say to them.

Rex

[HealingTee]

Thank you guys for responding! I will def leave it alone and I no longer feel tempted to text him and curse him out

[once removed]

I will def leave it alone and I no longer feel tempted to text him and curse him out

you will likely feel tempted again. i did, many times.

it helped me to put it in writing. i really let loose, i said things id never let anyone else read, horrible stuff.

if you lash out at him, youll only regret it later and youll feel even worse. but you can harness and use those feelings in constructive ways.