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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: Auras  (Read 960 times)
RedRightAnkle
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« on: October 17, 2011, 03:50:24 PM »

For those of you into energies and auras and the like - this might be interesting.

My ex claimed to read auras - some people really can, and both him and his older sister are very into things like this, so I never doubted him. He was telling me all of the different auras the people around him have, and one time he tried to read mine - but couldn't.

As we were breaking up the second time I was sitting on his floor, close to tears, trying to talk things out. Suddenly he said, "You must feel very strong right now." I asked him why and he replied, "Because I can actually see your aura now - it's very bright, solid green. It's spreading from your entire body." I was a little taken aback at first, but it was the least of my worries at that time.

After everything had settled and all was said and done I decided to look up what the colors of the aura usually represented. Apparently green is a healthy color, and people who have mostly green tend to be healers and love people. It represents the possibility of growth and change and healing. I don't know quite how to interpret that last part now, and I still don't  understand how because I felt "strong" he could read me (especially since at that time I felt as weak as ever).

What was my ex's aura you may ask? Black. His aura was black with streaks of red is what he told me. I looked up what black means and it usually signifies that they are draining (black consumes energy), guarded (black shielding what is hidden), vengeful, and generally someone in a lot of pain. I read a site that literally uses the word "psychic vampire" when they have a negative black energy. It also usually indicates that these people have suffered a trauma or some kind of abuse. I'm not sure what the red means, but I know read is very in tune with the physical body as well as could mean anger, friction, and anxiety.

Kind of eerie, don't you think - for a "healer" to be drawn in by someone so damaged? That he could have such a strong, yet negative aura? Does anyone here know much about auras? Either way I thought it was interesting... .
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« Reply #1 on: October 17, 2011, 05:37:49 PM »

Excerpt
My ex claimed to read auras - some people really can, and both him and his older sister are very into things like this, so I never doubted him. He was telling me all of the different auras the people around him have, and one time he tried to read mine - but couldn't.

Is there a small possibility that this allegedly paranormal talent might be manipulative of you? I think that James Randi still has a million dollar reward up for anyone who can prove that they read auras.  Sometimes people with metamagical thinking (any intrapsychic talent that cannot be empirically proven) want to be special but in doing so they often isolate themselves as "different," thereby drawing people in with their supposed special talents but keeping them at arm's distance at the same time. This often moves them into a World of Schizoid loneliness and social isolation because they need to have one on one encounters with believers rather than risk being a part of larger groups where they may be disbelieved, unless the large group gets their identity from the very same special talents.
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Clearmind
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« Reply #2 on: October 18, 2011, 05:11:26 AM »

 Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)  2010

Hi Red, I dont see how someone who is SO SO out of touch with their own emotions can even perceive or 'feel' someone elses aura.

I have to firstly say i am not into auras however I can recognise when someones energy is dark ~ i dont see an aura per say but i there stance, glance, body language speaks volumes to me ~ NOW!

IMHO he was using a diversional tactic to manipulate ~ trying to box you or comparmentalise you. In the middle of an important, emotional discussion is not the time to bring up auras. How did you feel when he said he saw green? Did it put you off? Stop you momentarily from seeing the bigger picture (what the discussion was about/the point or issue at hand)?
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RedRightAnkle
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« Reply #3 on: October 18, 2011, 09:17:31 AM »

I suppose it could be a tactic - I was a skeptic about all of this at first too. He actually has a lot of these weird "talents." He thinks he can control weather - that he can make it rain (there was a strange incidence where it seemed like he really did, but that could be coincidence). He also says that he can create these "energy balls" where he would put his hands together and it would get warm between his hands (which, thinking back, anyone can do - you can trap heat if you keep your hands cupped close enough).

It would make sense that he would feel this way (him and his sister), because he always wants to set himself apart, he was "misunderstood" and different. It wasn't until we went out with his sister's coworker and her family (who were all apparently "sensitive" - could harness energy and see ghosts and predict things) and they were all talking about how they all felt and what they could do and it was so eerie that I fully bought into it. I felt like I didn't belong with that group at all. Who was I to judge though? He's such a strange character, and he also has some other weird things about him (a possible alternate personality, for instance) that why wouldn't he be able to do this stuff?

I don't want to be skeptical - I want to keep an open mind that all of this stuff is possible; but when you two mention it being a manipulation tactic in his case it could be true. Someone else read his aura I think... .so what are the odds he would admit that he had a dark energy?

But CM, you're right - I thought it was odd that he brought that up so suddenly, and I definitely think it was used to distract me... .and yeah, it stopped me from dealing with what was really going on. To my surprise though he was the one that got us back on track.

I don't know... .maybe it's just wishful thinking and trying to make some kind of sense of all of this bull___.
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Calmdown
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« Reply #4 on: October 18, 2011, 11:11:40 AM »

I also think it was a manipulation tactic... to make you feel inadequate or like there was something wrong with you. How did you feel when this guy that could supposedly could read everyone's aura couldn't read yours? 
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RedRightAnkle
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« Reply #5 on: October 18, 2011, 03:42:10 PM »

I also think it was a manipulation tactic... to make you feel inadequate or like there was something wrong with you. How did you feel when this guy that could supposedly could read everyone's aura couldn't read yours? 

I felt like something was wrong with me, to be honest. He was telling me about everyone else's and his own, and the first time he tried to read mine he couldn't. I think we were having some little fight around then too... .or if anything he was upset about something-or-other (half the time I swear he didn't even know).

I really felt defective... .and at that time maybe that's what he was trying to do. He even went to read his brother's and could, then came back and couldn't read mine. How funny that he could suddenly read mine when I was about to leave him. I asked him what the colors mean and he didn't know... .he said he could only read them.

I'm all confused now... .like I said, I don't want to completely discount it, but you guys are more than likely right. Which means another mark for him... .another reason for me to be PISSED... .ugh. I'm caught in another angry stage at the moment, so this doesn't help :/
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Clearmind
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« Reply #6 on: October 18, 2011, 03:47:10 PM »

Anger is good Red - don't beat yourself over the head for that. I got real angry. This will help you come to a place of acceptance.
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rotgut
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« Reply #7 on: October 18, 2011, 04:12:51 PM »

 Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)  2010

I am one who also tries to keep an open mind, and naive enough to believe that anything is possible. Anything the mind can conceive mankind can achieve kind of thinking. And who knows maybe one day someone will even claim that million dollar prize. But I also remind myself that sometimes bull___ is just plain bull___. Stay strong.   
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harlemgurl
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« Reply #8 on: October 18, 2011, 04:14:11 PM »

This is an interesting topic.

My BPD ex believed he had some supernatural powers as well. If they believe this about themselves you really can't debate it because its true for them but a lot of the times it all boils down to a manipulative game they play with themselves and others to make themselves feel like they've got some supernatural talent. I don't think the game is intentional; just another survival tactic in trying to figure people out.

My ex heard voices and swears on his life that he knows what the devil looks like. And you know what? As spooky as it sounds I believe that he believes this. In the non world we call it paranoia.

What they are good at is figuring out the parts of us that will help them get them what they want. Children know how to do this and people with BPD are no different. We aren't even aware of the ways that they are sizing us up when we are in their clutches. Figuring us out is sometimes about exploitation, manipulation, conning others, conniving, other times its about protecting themselves... .

I'm like Clearmind. I'm not always emotionally clairvoyant but I can tell when a person carries a black cloud over their heads. I've seen my ex many times after the break up and he certainly carries the cloud.

HG
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« Reply #9 on: October 18, 2011, 08:48:45 PM »

Excerpt
He thinks he can control weather - that he can make it rain (there was a strange incidence where it seemed like he really did, but that could be coincidence). I don't want to be skeptical - I want to keep an open mind that all of this stuff is possible

My first thought was the Military would love him! But then I remembered the, "Men Who Stare at Goats" movie, which was about the U.S. Army's exploration of New Age concepts and potential military applications of the paranormal. The title referred to having the military attempt to kill goats by staring at them. I'm not sure if they also believed they could control the weather- but imagine if two soldiers were fighting over the task?

There's an old saying: "You can’t reason someone out of a position they didn’t reason themselves into."

Beliefs need reasons, but often the reasons are hidden underneath the beliefs. Hidden beliefs can become distorted unless they are tested every now and then - and the outcome of the test- *revising* the belief. That takes courage and involves change.  For instance, if you can't change (control) the weather every day- then maybe you need to revise the belief that you can control the weather?

The more that people make themselves out to be God-like, the further it drives them away from their spiritual or true nature, which is that we are all *equal* in the eyes of God.  You'll have to address the need here for the belief that one person has special powers above the other and how your need to believe those special powers factors into your attraction to that person as well.  Idea

Keeping an open mind about metaphysics is good, but factoring in a little bit of skepticism about the people who claim special powers can be courageous, as it calls upon those special people with special powers to prove them. This is a "reasoned" approach that tests the belief.  If those people get angry or mad because they cannot prove their beliefs, then you have your answer right there.  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)


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RedRightAnkle
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« Reply #10 on: October 18, 2011, 10:04:17 PM »

Thanks for the support Rotgut and Clearmind Smiling (click to insert in post) I'm also realizing this anger is also causing some ancient anger to bubble up and dump on top of the new stuff. I'm sure I'll post about all of that in detail some other time soon.

HG, what you say kind of relates to what 2010 says about how I should look into why I feel the need to believe him when he says all of this. He saw my fascination with all of this stuff (and also my skepticism at the beginning) and played on it. He even played on my skepticism - guilt tripped me into believing him by pouting that only a few people REALLY believed him. I wanted to be one of those people... .he wanted to be seen as superior somehow, and that's how he did it.

I will say though that he could suck the energy out of a room - if he wasn't happy, ain't nobody was happy ;p  He always carried this darkness with him. I also wonder why his sister would be into it then - she certainly isn't BPD (though I am almost certain she's a serious co-dependent), but she believes she can do some of the same things. I was honestly skeptical about it all at first until I went to dinner with those people - they were nuts, but somehow all of those people around me sharing the same attitude freaked me out. And I know deep in me that I WANT to believe it... .I just might not fully. That's also something I need to figure out.

2010, I think I'm already exploring my need to believe him, and pieces are fitting together. It's murky, but it's definitely something I want to look further into. I think real or not, it's all fascinating... .but I'm a natural skeptic about everything, so it is hard for me to fully believe it all. Thank you all for your responses... .it's all been really thought-provoking.
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