Cutting ties

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

I have been separated since November 2011. Filed for divorce Jan 2012 but he was not served until June. There has been physical abuse in the past. I have protective orders and he wsa just arrested yesterday for violating those orders. He uses contact with the kids as a means of control. I have sole custody and he has visitation but he takes control. It has been hell for 15 months.

After his latest episode this weekend of more accusations on my cheating and coming to my workplace and children's school where there is also a restraining order against him, I am at my wits end. He was arrested today and has already been released. I am scared as to what is going to happen next. My lawyer is going to court tomorrow to suspend his visitation and to have all contact with kids (we have 4) stopped. He is not going to like this. I am nervous how we will react. He coached our son in wrestling and baseball which he will not be able to do with this order. I know it needs to be done as his episodes are getting worse. I do not think he is on his meds.

Not sure I am strong enough to keep fighting.

[4mykidz]

I have been separated since November 2011. Filed for divorce Jan 2012 but he was not served until June. There has been physical abuse in the past. I have protective orders and he wsa just arrested yesterday for violating those orders. He uses contact with the kids as a means of control. I have sole custody and he has visitation but he takes control. It has been hell for 15 months.

After his latest episode this weekend of more accusations on my cheating and coming to my workplace and children's school where there is also a restraining order against him, I am at my wits end. He was arrested today and has already been released. I am scared as to what is going to happen next. My lawyer is going to court tomorrow to suspend his visitation and to have all contact with kids (we have 4) stopped. He is not going to like this. I am nervous how we will react. He coached our son in wrestling and baseball which he will not be able to do with this order. I know it needs to be done as his episodes are getting worse. I do not think he is on his meds.

Not sure I am strong enough to keep fighting.

[tog]

Ugh, that sounds awful. 

What's the alternative to fighting? Your kids need you-obviously he can't parent them adequately. Do you have supports? Friends, family, a good therapist?