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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: Abuse  (Read 599 times)
Rose Tiger
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 2075



« Reply #30 on: February 28, 2013, 11:28:54 AM »

   I was a military brat growing up, we moved a lot.  It was hard to make new friends and then finally getting a couple only to move once again.  I was a lonely kiddo much of the time.  Ex is so charming, he has a way of charming everyone he meets, I finally caught on that it's because of the mirroring.  You 'feel' so at home with him quickly.  "You like everything I like?  This is wonderful!"  And it was wonderful to have someone take that lonely feeling away.  I've never felt so close to another person.  And then it all went to fizzle.

I've been watching the George lurchlookalike show, recording it from Nick at night or something like that.  I like watching the dynamics between George and his tv wife, Angie.  They argue, they bicker but it's not in that horrible tear a person down way.  George's mom is also a piece of work and their dynamic is interesting, too.  I know what I had with ex was unhealthy, it was too good to be true.  I think George is more realistic since it's work and compromise and being generally mad sometimes but having the gumption to work it through.  That seems more realistic to me.
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