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Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
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Topic: burnout (Read 337 times)
screwedovr
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 19
burnout
«
on:
February 22, 2013, 11:16:59 AM »
Do BPDs ever just burn out, kinda get tired of changing themselves with new relationships, always putting on an act. Or do they just get worse and angrier with every failed relationship
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hithere
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Posts: 953
Re: burnout
«
Reply #1 on:
February 22, 2013, 02:50:43 PM »
Mine also had AHDD, she seemed to never get tired... . she could fight like a crazy dog for hours and hours and then start a new fight.
I actually think they are invigorated by the crazy making, that is how it seemed with my ex.
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susanleona
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Posts: 154
Re: burnout
«
Reply #2 on:
February 22, 2013, 03:04:29 PM »
They just rewrite their mental history, make up a woe me story in their head for the next one (and really believe it too), and stay chipper!
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RedCandle
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Posts: 116
Re: burnout
«
Reply #3 on:
February 22, 2013, 03:11:29 PM »
Typically, the "cure" for burnout is to change things up... .
... . change your job, your exercise routine, your schedule... .
Hence we see BPD's QUICKLY "change out" their relationships.
Get a new one.
And get it fast.
And so they avoid the burnout... .
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seeking balance
Retired Staff
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What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Relationship status: divorced
Posts: 7146
Re: burnout
«
Reply #4 on:
February 22, 2013, 03:36:11 PM »
Quote from: RedCandle on February 22, 2013, 03:11:29 PM
Typically, the "cure" for burnout is to change things up... .
... . change your job, your exercise routine, your schedule... .
Hence we see BPD's QUICKLY "change out" their relationships.
Get a new one.
And get it fast.
And so they avoid the burnout... .
I want to stress this is very true. When things calm down (let's face it, we all justified behavior on some circumstance or another) this is when we tend to see the worst of the maladaptive coping. If there is chaos, having to deal with real feelings is not the focus. So, why not keep chaos going?
A relationship tends to last when the non is just as OK with chaos as the pwBPD... . nons get burned out, pwBPD who are not in treatment tend to thrive in change. They may say they don't, but look at their actions.
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Faith does not grow in the house of certainty - The Shack
struggli
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 591
Re: burnout
«
Reply #5 on:
February 22, 2013, 05:10:04 PM »
Quote from: seeking balance on February 22, 2013, 03:36:11 PM
Quote from: RedCandle on February 22, 2013, 03:11:29 PM
Typically, the "cure" for burnout is to change things up... .
... . change your job, your exercise routine, your schedule... .
Hence we see BPD's QUICKLY "change out" their relationships.
Get a new one.
And get it fast.
And so they avoid the burnout... .
I want to stress this is very true. When things calm down (let's face it, we all justified behavior on some circumstance or another) this is when we tend to see the worst of the maladaptive coping. If there is chaos, having to deal with real feelings is not the focus. So, why not keep chaos going?
A relationship tends to last when the non is just as OK with chaos as the pwBPD... . nons get burned out, pwBPD who are not in treatment tend to thrive in change. They may say they don't, but look at their actions.
My ex said she was a "creature of habit." ahahhahahahahhaahhahahahhahahha
The habit of inconsistency perhaps.
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screwedovr
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 19
Re: burnout
«
Reply #6 on:
February 23, 2013, 09:53:37 AM »
thanks for your responses, my xw definitely jumped right into the next relatioship. Her BPD symptoms really went haywire as her 40th b-day got closer. Guess thats why she left me for a more exciting 30 yr old. She always was bored with everyday family life. Always wanted to constantly do things out of our financial means. She showed me! Now She gets a ton of my money every month and the new guys money.
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