OMG I miss my ex tonight. WTH?

[gettingoverit]

Ok, so I don't know what it... .  the moon, the alignment of the stars whatever it is I was seriously triggered tonight. I was listening to the radio tonight and this song came on that I had never heard before and the words just got to me. I mean I was teary eyed and actually missing my ex! I can't stand her. I don't know what it is. To make matters worse I've been dating this new woman for over a year and definitely have no desire to EVER want to be with my xBPDgf. What the heck gives? I have not felt like this about my x in a long time. I thought I was over this... .  still feeling teary though. Is this normal even after all this time (2yrs)?

[struggli]

What is it about her you are missing?

[findingmyselfagain]

Gettingoverit, it's been over 2 years for me and the whole thing still blows my mind every now and then. I remember all the lovey-dovey, feeling like I really had met the One. The ending still puzzles me. But I tell myself now that it was all an illusion and very dysfunctional. The honeymoon wasn't even really all that great. There were plenty of red flags (though seemingly small at the time) that I shouldn't have ignored. Is that the case with you? Aren't we better off without the chaos and drama? I loved my ex, but love can't fix her. It's sad, but up to us to push away and not to go back. I know I'm not in danger of going back either. It's still a bit of work to keep her from renting space sometimes. I wish I could go back and make a better decision and hadn't emailed her. I should have stuck to my boundaries much better.