psychological explanation

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

Often, when a person or group wants our loyalty, there will be an initiation period (e.g., the armed forces, a college fraternity).  The pwBPD does the same thing.  They come with problems to be solved.  Suicidal gestured that must be handled.  Self-injury that must be soothed.  Rages that must be withstood.  I think that along with the idealization phase, this initiation phase bonds us tightly to the pwBPD and contributes to us overlooking many questionable behaviors.

[Scott44]

Often, when a person or group wants our loyalty, there will be an initiation period (e.g., the armed forces, a college fraternity).  The pwBPD does the same thing.  They come with problems to be solved.  Suicidal gestured that must be handled.  Self-injury that must be soothed.  Rages that must be withstood.  I think that along with the idealization phase, this initiation phase bonds us tightly to the pwBPD and contributes to us overlooking many questionable behaviors.

[P.F.Change]

How does this fit into your own personal growth?

PF

[Scott44]

It has opened my eyes to what a relationship should be.  And shouldn't be - it doesn't have to be so difficult and such a constant trial.