What does it mean to "Let go" ?

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

I was handed this perhaps 6 months ago while I was in the depths and throes of emotional/psychological pain and turmoil following my breakup with my wife.  I didn't pay much attention or give it much heed back then.  Today I found it while cleaning up my office, and it seems exceptionally clear and helpful to me today.  Seems as though internalizing and practicing this simple message would heal me and I would mature and become healthy.  I have deep issues that could be called co-dependency, that have disrupted me and with it I have hurt those I love throughout my life.  Seems as though it would do the same for my dBPD separated wife, if she were to internalize and practice it:

LET GO

To “let go” does not mean to stop caring, it means I can’t do it for someone else

To “let go” is not to cut myself off, it’s the realization that I can’t control another.

To “let go” is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To “let go” is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To “let go” is not to try to change or blame another, it’s to make the most of myself.

To “let go” is not to care for, but to care about.

To “let go” is not to fix, but to be supportive.

To “let go” is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.

To “let go” is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their destinies.

To “let go” is not to be protective, it’s to allow another to face reality.

To “let go” is not to deny, but to accept.

To “let go” is not to nag, scold, or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.

To “let go” is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.

To “let go” is not regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.

To “let go” is to fear less and love more.

[morningagain]

I was handed this perhaps 6 months ago while I was in the depths and throes of emotional/psychological pain and turmoil following my breakup with my wife.  I didn't pay much attention or give it much heed back then.  Today I found it while cleaning up my office, and it seems exceptionally clear and helpful to me today.  Seems as though internalizing and practicing this simple message would heal me and I would mature and become healthy.  I have deep issues that could be called co-dependency, that have disrupted me and with it I have hurt those I love throughout my life.  Seems as though it would do the same for my dBPD separated wife, if she were to internalize and practice it:

LET GO

To “let go” does not mean to stop caring, it means I can’t do it for someone else

To “let go” is not to cut myself off, it’s the realization that I can’t control another.

To “let go” is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To “let go” is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To “let go” is not to try to change or blame another, it’s to make the most of myself.

To “let go” is not to care for, but to care about.

To “let go” is not to fix, but to be supportive.

To “let go” is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.

To “let go” is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their destinies.

To “let go” is not to be protective, it’s to allow another to face reality.

To “let go” is not to deny, but to accept.

To “let go” is not to nag, scold, or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.

To “let go” is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.

To “let go” is not regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.

To “let go” is to fear less and love more.

[seeking balance]

I remember the first time I read this - never more true than in a BPD relationship.

thanks for sharing!

SB

[Take2]

I love that.  I am going to save that one... .  yes, thank you for sharing... . !

[Rockylove]

 

Just copied and printed that one out for myself!  I'm putting it on the wall where I'll see it and read it daily.  I'm finding that when I post affirmations and helpful reminders such as this around my home, it helps me remember that I'm not so enlightened that I don't need the poke in the ribs now and again.  It's too easy to revert back to some old habits~~I want to continually move forward.  Thanks so much for posting this!

[Cardinals in Flight]

Ditto!  Needed to see this in writing, I'm saving 

[laelle]

Thank you,

Saving

 

laelle

[LetItBe]

Thank you.  This is timely!  Saving it, also... .  

[Mountaineagle]

Beautiful  Also saving