I survived and feel great

[cal644]

So today we had a softball tourney for my daughter - I was polite, courtious, made small"verysmall" talk with my stbex. and I survived!  I no longer felt that longing to be with her, I no longer felt that deep seated saddness.  I thought to myself before the game "she can ruin her life but I'm not going to let her ruin mine!".  I did catch her at times looking at me with deep regret or longing in her eyes - but I right away told myself - "hey it's her loss - let her know what a great guy she lost, let her know that she made the biggest mistake of her life, let her know that I deserve better - someone who can truly love me the way I love them".  I feel great after today - the best I felt for weeks !  Because I think I hit that point of truly letting her go - I know what a great guy I am, I know the love I gave her, I know that she made a mistake and will learn to regret the actions and decisions she chose - but who cares!

[Murbay]

Very well said cal and I'm glad the experience today made you feel better in yourself. That's a real step forward 

[leftbehind]

Yay!  Congratulations Cal644, that's great!