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BPDFamily.com
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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
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Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
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Realization or Feign?
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Topic: Realization or Feign? (Read 404 times)
stop2think
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 111
Realization or Feign?
«
on:
June 05, 2013, 03:29:49 PM »
I don't know how to associate this bit that trips me, do pwBPD/NPD 'realise' or pretend but this one time during are constant arguements or low points - he told me how greatly the arguements took a toll on him that he has been 'reading' about clinical depression as he thinks he is in one.
Pretty sure he never sought help, and his friends had no clue of his situation as he isolates himself from family and friends at times like this.
Trying to figure if he knows he is mentally ill, saw the light or did he have an intention behind telling stuff like this one?
Any help on this one guys, would be greatly appreciated. Thanks as always!
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schwing
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Relationship status: married to a non
Posts: 3618
Re: Realization or Feign?
«
Reply #1 on:
June 05, 2013, 04:42:03 PM »
They can "realize" that they have a problem. But then just as suddenly, "realize" that they don't have a problem and that you were the cause of all their problems so then they have nothing to take care of on their part.
I see it as part of their "splitting" behavior (black & white thinking) only applied to themselves. In black & white thinking, you are either completely flawed (black) or else you are perfect (white) with no in between.
So even after he "realized" he had a problem. His splitting behavior would cause him to devalue himself and thus criticize himself, berate himself, hate himself... . until, he couldn't take it any more and then *dissociate* (e.g., projection) those negative qualities he cannot accept of himself (such as depression, or BPD symptoms).
So unfortunately, epiphanies are short-lived and reversible.
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