Drug Treatment

[opheliasmom]

Hi to All,  I have been away trying to deal with my 19 year old daughter w/BPD.  She is addicted to heroin and has requested to go to rehab.  This tuesday we drove to a facility that she had attended two years ago.  During the intake procedure she advised that she had BPD, the only thing that has changed since her last admission.  Despite the fact that she reported suicide ideations the facility would not accept her.  They claimed that she needed psychiatric clearance from her Pdoc.  I explained that because she has been using heroin she has not been seeing her Pdoc and that she needed to get detoxed and stabilized.  They harshly turned her away. I was once a firm believer in the truth.  No longer do I believe.  I am convinced that the reason they would not treat her is because she said the dirty words Borderline Personality Disorder.  We are trying to get her into another facility and hopefully the outcome will be different.  This is not the first time we have had difficulty with alleged mental health professionals.  A few years ago a therapist told us there was no treatment for BPD.  She had never even heard of DBT.  Right now my battle is getting my daughter into treatment.  I hope I have the energy to one day crusade for BPD education for the so called mental health treatment community.  I am thinking I may report this incident to SAMHSA, unless someone has a better suggestion?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Rapt Reader]

Hi, opheliasmom... . Do you have a Dual Diagnosis Program/Center in your area that your daughter might be able to be admitted to? My own dBPDs36 had been in and out of 2 "normal" Rehabs in a 3 year period (this was prior to his BPD Dx), and each time he relapsed back to his opiate addiction. It wasn't until his 21-day inpatient stay in a Dual Diagnosis Center Program in March-April 2013 that his mental health issues were thoroughly addressed as a priority that he finally "got it" and he is now more than 4 months clean and sober and on his way to good health.

With his Insurance (mostly Medicaid) there were technical circumstances that had to be fulfilled before he could be accepted (and, maybe the Center required these things, too): He had to have been in and out of conventional Rehab twice with no end success; he had to be diagnosed with at least one mental health issue co-morbid with the addiction (he has many); he had to have been hospitalized at least once for suicidal ideations; he had to be detoxed prior to admission (and he was clean for 2 weeks prior). If there is such a program around for your daughter, and she qualifies (if she is not clean now, she would have time to detox while the paperwork and research were happening), I would highly recommend you look into it.

My son was referred to the DD Center by his Outpatient Therapist for his drug addictions and the hospital that admitted him for his suicidal ideations (The OP T & hospital Psych used the DD Center admission as the condition of his release to our custody, while the admission paperwork and waiting period--for a bed--was being completed. The time between release from the hospital and admission to the DD Center was about 2.5 weeks).

I tell you all of this because the normal Rehabs did not adequately address his mental health issues; only the Dual Diagnosis Program (where he was actually Dxed with the BPD; he was admitted for ADD, Clinical Depression, Social Anxiety, SA & SI issues) took the time to have intensive mental health evaluations, therapies, etc. He had daily Psychiatrist sessions, Psychologist sessions, Social Worker sessions--one on one and Group--daily for 21 days. He learned DBT, had an extensive library of books provided to him addressing his many problems and DXs (which he read eagerly), and when he was discharged he readily continued his Ts while living at home. He was released on April 4, 2013, and is still doing all his Ts with relish and optimism.

The only differences in his attitude and desire for change and a healthier, better life are the DD Center rather than normal Rehab; the information I learned on this site soon after he came home and the changes I've made in my communication with him; and a new T he is participating in (which I learned of on this site!) intensively: Neurofeedback Therapy. Your daughter, like my son, seems to be willing to get help at last, so I feel the need to have told you all of this... . I hope there is a way you can find a Dual Diagnosis Program by you; going to that WAS the beginning of my son's new life   

[opheliasmom]

Thank you Rapt Reader,

I am happy that your son is progressing and hope he continues.  I did get my daughter into a regular rehab on Friday.  They say they handle dual diagnosis so we will see.  My goal was to get her clean.  We live in a rural area and mental health resources are very limited.  The therapist she sees (when she is clean) is wonderful.  However they just don't have the resources to provide the intensive treatment she needs.  My goal would be to get her into a program like the one your son attends.  First she has to be willing and then I would need to figure out where.  McClean in boston is my dreambut so far she is not willing to make the commitment in time or effort.  I will have to wait and see how she responds to treatment this time... . Thanks for your information.

[Rapt Reader]

Hi, opheliasmom   

I'm so glad you were able to get her admitted so quickly (the 2.5 week wait for my son to get into the DD Center after leaving the hospital seemed like an eternity!), and yes, I do understand the motivation and hurry to get her into treatment sooner rather than later! Congratulations, and I sincerely hope she learns and grows and thrives in this environment. If they do handle dual diagnoses, and include her mental health issues as well as the drug abuse, then she should do well. The reason my son's 2 prior stays were unsuccessful is because there really was no working on his underlying mental health problems, just the dealing with the drug abuse. One place did the 12-step program (which he learned a lot from and he still utilizes the steps), and the other had one Psychiatrist on staff whom my son saw one time per week... . not much in terms of what he really needed!

Have you had the chance to check out this site while your daughter is undergoing treatment, so that when she comes out you will have a better understanding of how her brain works, and how to communicate better? I didn't know of my son's BPD Dx till after he got out in April, when the DD Center included the diagnosis and this website's address with the discharge papers, so I had to do my research and applying the techniques in a VERY condensed fashion. I'm happy you have the time to get a handle on it sooner; posting here was the first step... .

A parent's greatest wish is for their child, whatever their age, to be healthy and happy. When a child suffers from BPD, often not only is the child unhappy and unhealthy, but so is everyone who loves them. This mental illness severely affects everyone, creating drama and heartbreak, while also piling on the guilt and anxiety. Most parents search desperately for answers, and try all the gimmicks that popular culture tells us should work - only to face even more severe rages and acting out behavior.

There are answers though, and we are here to offer you the support and encouragement to help you reach those goals. There are things that can be done to stop making things worse and begin to make them better. A great place to start is with this set of resources: What can a parent do? We look forward to seeing you on the Supporting a son or daughter suffering from BPD board and hope you join us on this journey. When you are ready to post more of your story and if you have more questions, the people over on that Board above (among whom is me!) will welcome you with open arms and minds, giving you more support and compassion than you could ever imagine   

[jellibeans]

Hey O

that is good news... . one step at a time. Get clean and then try and work on her other issues. Keep strong!  

[Rapt Reader]

Hey, opheliasmom... . Forgive my last "on autopilot" post! I know you're not a newbie, and for some reason I got caught up in wanting to give some good links, forgot myself, and got carried away    (Duh!)

But, the sentiment was sincere... . I hope you, your daughter and your family will be healed and happy!   

(Please forgive me?)

[opheliasmom]

Hi Rapt Reader,

Your sentiment is much appreciated, no forgiveness needed.  She only lasted nine days in rehab and declared herself cured.  She came home and started using again.  Thank Goodness for everyone here and Al Anon or I would be a complete wreck.  If she is ever ready for treatment I will be there for her.  On a positive note, when I do interact with her I have been practicing Validation.  When I am sincere it really seems to help smooth out our conversations.  Hugs to all.