She was also the kind of mother that bribed her son to behave at a young age, so in other words if he threw a fit over something she would give him what he wanted to get him to stop.
Good lord, this is
exactly how my upwBPDexGF deals with her daughter, pretty much exclusively!
Everything is a negotiation -- from what's for dinner to when dinner happens, to when bedtime happens, to whether or not schoolwork gets done, to whether or not she takes a bath/shower before bed -- absolutely maddening!
Did I try to help? Sure. Foolishly -- and generally to my own detriment, in terms of how mom would respond to my attempts. Eventually, I just detached from it -- and when she'd ask me for my opinion, I'd tell her I was sure she'd figure it out. On a few occasions, she'd tell me that she tried one of my "old school" parenting methods, and it worked wonders -- but in our 2 yrs together, I never actually witnessed her doing that, and suspect that she just told me those things to make me feel like she valued my feedback. Ugh!