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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: Possible past diagnosis?  (Read 465 times)
Cipher13
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 838


« on: September 11, 2013, 12:13:56 PM »

I was thinking last night about the possibility my wife had been diagnosed with BPD just after we got married and I went into the army. She was having sever separation anxiety. I thought I remember maybe something about Bipolar and Panic Anxiety with a goraphobia. BPD may have been mentioned at the time but I can't remeber as I had no idea what that was at the time.

Can there be any way to bring this up in a way that doesn't cause further problems or am I just causing a probelm I don't need to be causing? Either way I guess it won't help.
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Surnia
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: 8 y married, divorced since 2012-11-22
Posts: 3900



« Reply #1 on: September 11, 2013, 10:49:25 PM »

Hi Cipher13

I can understand that you are longing for an affirmation through a diagnose.

I would let it drop however. Its difficult to receive 100% affirmation. You are posting here on Undecided. My guess is that you are assuming knowing her true? diagnosis would help you to decide?
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“Don’t shrink. Don’t puff up. Stand on your sacred ground.”  Brené Brown
Cipher13
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 838


« Reply #2 on: September 12, 2013, 08:02:00 AM »

The only way it would help is if it lead to her acknoledging maybe she needs to seek help.
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