So sorry to hear this, HAH.
Going through times where our SO are very desregulated are very hard.
So, all your boys are from your previous marriage? I would keep them out of it us much as possible. Good they are a night out.
So did I get this right, he is not living anymore in the same house with you?
I said I will not tolerate his aggressive and harassing behaviour towards me and that I will call the police if he does either or tries to enter the house until we agree it’s safe. I encouraged him to call his therapist or the acute mental health team for support.
I think you really did the right thing so far.
Please stay in touch, HAH, we are here for you.