Advocates in my Neighborhood

[scraps66]

I have had this lingering issue since moving back into the marital residence.  During separation my exuNPD/BPDw was successful in having me booted from the house, and then successful in dragggin the settlement out 19 monhts, 15 of which I paid for the mortgage on the house where she, and eventually her boyfriend would live. 

In the over 2yrs I have been back in the house, I have kept my mouth shut, but have endured an ostricized existence in my nieghborhood.  Though no one has approached me directly, there is an awkwardness for me when walking donw the street.  People look at me, and it is obvious there is some skepticism in their eyes.  The whole situation is made more difficult by the fact that ex's bf is good friends with one of the neighbors down the street.  Also, my S6 is good friends with thier S5 and they play together everyday S6 is with me.

I am strong-arming my ex on a few parenting issues that require modification to the Order.

Last week I was met with my first confrontation.  Teh mother of the S5 that my S6 plays with, wife of the neighbor that is good friends with ex's bf, sent me an over the top somewaht nasty text message the other night about me leaving my S6 with her S5 at her house while I went to run an errand.  I told her where I was going in a text, and she didn't comment.  Couple days later, ":)on't you ever leave S6 here, blah blah."  I get her meaing, but the tone was harsh.

I have no doubts that they have been getting at least sublte untruths about me.  I have pondered saying something to them about the things they hear from exuBPD/NPDw.  I also don't doubt that the burst of activity at the start of the school year has ex chirping like a bird about how horrible I am to put the kids in before/after care and not let her pick them up.

So I have considered saying something to these people, but uncertain.  In the times I have made this consideration in the past, I have resisted, and it's been OK.  This time, not sure.

All the parents see me with my kids a lot when they're with me.  My gf tells me just leave it alone and you'd be better off not getting invovled in the slander.  But this is my neighborhood and ex just can't seem to stay away.     

[Free One]

All the parents see me with my kids a lot when they're with me.  My gf tells me just leave it alone and you'd be better off not getting invovled in the slander.  But this is my neighborhood and ex just can't seem to stay away.     

I know it is so difficult to be in your position, but I think your girlfriend is right. It's unbelievably frustrating, but sometimes the best thing you can do is take the high road, lead your life with integrity, and eventually (yes, maybe years), those people will see the truth. I hate saying that to you, because I hate hearing it when I am frustrating and hurting and my ex is still doing things that cause me pain, but I am seeing now that the truth does come out eventually.

[scraps66]

Thanks.  I pretty much knew the answer to my query as Imyself have demonstrated over the years.  The very woman who was so tacit to me was nice as pie yesterday.  Just writing that thread made me revisit the right answer.  My real concern is that my children can negotiate the neighborhood without ill will.  Something that my ex doesn't necessarily understand, the fact that her slander of me, it does have an impact on the kids.  She's more thirsty for psycholigcal abuse, in hopes of making herself look comparatively better, than she is the best interest of the children.