First post in "Leaving... "

[niimin]

I've been sitting on the fence for far too long.

I have been full of fear, pre-occupied at work... .and stressed about everything.

Wishing he'd follow through on his threats to leave aren't cutting it anymore... .

Today was the last straw (I hope), in a perfect world, it would end without incident... .I am not naive enough to believe that that is possible.

Wondering if all our families belongings will be destroyed when I get home... .if he will be there waiting to yell... .scream... .destroy things or finally cross the line and hit me.

gonna pick my son up from school so he doesn't have to go home alone, and have a heart to heart with him... .make a plan together and finally be accountable for my part in the relationship and what I have allowed my son to be exposed to.

have called my close friends and made sure we have a place to go... .I believe this is the beginning of a long painful trip... .but also the beginning of a new life for me

[strikeforce]

I wish you all the best 

You will look back some time from now and be glad you made the right decision 

[Lucky Jim]

Hi Niimin, The first step in a new direction is always the hardest.  I admire your courage to make a change.  No one should have to worry about having his/her property destroyed and/or getting screamed at, particularly from one's spouse.  I should know: my uBPDxW smashed family heirlooms, punched a hole in the wall, threw wine bottles, locked me out of the house and yelled at me plenty of times.  I predict that you won't miss all the drama and that your life will get much more peaceful.  Good luck!  Lucky Jim

[SeekerofTruth]

Think thru the various components of your exit plan.

Write out your objective steps to help you focus on follow-thru.

Know which components you have control over, and which components of the exit plan entail contingencies.

I trust you have an individual therapist to bounce your intentions and plans off of while refining your exit plan and getting the support you need.