This is a time that I need support, I am dealing with my grandma being ill and I used to be very close with her, before I met my husband. It makes me angry that I have to see her less because my husband doesn't want to be around my family. There are other reasons but I think I go out there less just so I don't have to deal with my husband getting irritated with my family.
Hey there,
Sorry that he isn't supportive of you when you need him I know a couple of very painful moments when I wanted my husband to be there for me and he just wasn't emotionally capable of it. Its like wishing that a duck wouldn't quack and then being resentful when they do.
I think that its a slippery slope to go be around your family less so that you don't have to deal with your husband being irritated. What I would probably do is step back... .ask myself how much I really want to see my family. And then use SET to explain that to my husband (that is actually why I go away once every six months to see my dad). If its once a week.
Maybe its
Husband, I love you and I really appreciate our time together. I know that being around my family of drunks is frustrating to you. Its really, really hard to see my parents and uncle drink all the time. I love my grandma and I have always been close to her. Unfortunately she is sick and I know that she won't be around forever. Therefore I am going to go see her once a week going forward. You are welcome to come but if you don't want to - I totally understand.
The other thing is that when he's in a good place you may want to ask why he doesn't like you going out to see them alone. I suspect that it may be because he is trying to protect you from their bad and it comes out twisted.