Hi,
Just a story to share. My relationship ended 1 January this year. I was in for a recycle in April, but from my side it was just 4 long talks about BPD leading to nothing, no relationship (no thanks), just rather friendly talks. The end ? No !
The fact that our dog died, who was with her, was another contact from her side a month ago, but I didn't ask how or what. We are in very low contact due to a financial issue as she has to pay me back for a part of the renovation of her house. She often needs a reminder, ehum. And I keep it really pragmatic and if she becomes angry, I face her with the facts of what will happen by not paying me back. The end everytime.
She lives together again with her husband from whom she is to divorce since 5 years almost. They just live together as brother and sister, no relationship, sleep seperately she says (or not, don't know, don't care
). He has serious NPD traits and allows her everything, just to keep his perfect marriage up to the outside world. Meanwhile she recyles the exes.
Ten days ago she contacted me again to tell me what happened with the dog. Mailed me some pics from her house, her daughter. I knew where the wind was coming from
The most funny line was still to come : Actually I contact you, not because I want to recycle you, but because I miss you. I don't have BPD.
And also : I did read your book about us, and it is full of lies about my family, friends and exes. (I did write a book under an alias, with other names about our story). Curiously she didn't mention : and about me... .
Now that's a contradiction isn't it !
It goes on : I have bought your perfume. I actually wear it now and often. I miss you so much. I miss all of your love. I want to come to talk with you. But not about the past. I have been out last night, and kissed a guy I don't know. I was drunk.
Another serious contradiction isn't it !
I did buy a another second hand car, (BMW of course - the husband paid for it) because the other one will cost to much to have it repaired. But it doesn't drive as fast as the other one.
Meanwhile the new second hand car is back on line to be sold, and she's keeping the old one now. Seems to be no problem any more.
Another serious contradiction.
So I decided to confront her with the contradictions. And if she found that normal behavior.
Reaction that came was equally predictable : Oh you're going to start about BPD again right ? I just had a moment of weakness about you that's all. My answer was : to be honest, you behave again exactly like someone with BPD, sorry to say so.
Last famous words from her side : Psychopath ! Nem !
That was a fast end to a recycle atempt !
