Becoming a counsellor with experience of BPD - good idea?

[Blondy90]

Hi guys,

I'm seriously considering training to be a counsellor/therapist in the future. However, I have struggled with my sister's dBPD since childhood and have been through a lot in life. I was just wondering what your opinions were on going in to a healing profession with this experience. Is it a good idea because I could empathise or would you say to steer clear because I'd have biased experiences?

Thanks in advance for your feedback!

[GeekyGirl]

If it's something you're passionate about and interested in, why not? Yes, you might have a bias from your own experiences, but you might also find it very rewarding and may find that you can be impartial about other people's situations.

Would you want to treat people with BPD? What interests you most about becoming a therapist?

[Blondy90]

I've always been good at giving advice and the 'go to' friend when people need help and I've always just found it so rewarding. My counsellor mentioned I would make a good counsellor myself and it got me thinking seriously about it.

I think just knowing that I could help to heal and give people an outlet for real change and positivity in their lives makes me want to take it up. Of course I realise it is a hard job to do and it would be very challenging to hear some of the stories people have but I think I would be well suited.

I'm not sure about treating people with BPD, I think I have a good stand point to do it but I'm not sure I could give the best help. Maybe that's because my sister has made me feel so inadequate about helping her sometimes? It would certainly be a challenge!

[Moonbeam77]

I'm not sure about treating people with BPD, I think I have a good stand point to do it but I'm not sure I could give the best help. Maybe that's because my sister has made me feel so inadequate about helping her sometimes? It would certainly be a challenge!

I am a RN that works with people that have eating disorders.  I myself struggle at times with anxiety.  I feel that I have greater empathy with the people I work with since I can relate to their feelings of anxiety (although I personally don't struggle with anxiety related to food or body image).  I feel that my own personal experiences are different enough that I can be more objective when helping my patients struggling with their eating disorder.  It sounds like counseling might be a natural fit for you.  I would suggest not specializing in BPD treatment. 

[Clearmind]

Having discovered I have a BPD parent meant that as a child I grew up quickly - I became my father's little fixer and I then went on to date Borderlines who I also tried to fix and care take. It gave me value and if I wasn't fixing my BPDex or someone for that matter I did not feel valued. I dated Borderlines to relinquish guilt and obligations I felt as a child.

If you are wanting to become a counsellor I think that is fabulous. Be mindful of the reasons you are pursuing it and to ensure its not a carry over from care taking a BPD family member.

A counsellors role is to facilitate a client's healing rather than fix.

Our healing and recovery is just as important as our BPD loved one.

All the best to you... .

[AlwaysTheQuietOne]

As someone who also has a family member with BPD, I think it would be nice to go to a therapist who has experience dealing with the things I'm going through.

[Blondy90]

Thanks for the feedback everyone. You make a good point Clearmind. I was always the strong one trying to hold the family together when my mum was falling apart and my sister was off the rails. I have tried to 'fix' people in relationships too so I totally get where you're coming from. I have thought about it though and worked through my feelings with the help of a counsellor and I don't think I would want to be a counsellor myself to carry over the care taking as I let go of doing that when I was 17 and worked to move forward from it with help.

I am looking in to taking an advanced diploma in counselling and psychotherapy course next year so I may soon start on the path to pursuing counselling as a career! I'm sure if I take the course I will quickly know if it will suit me.

[Clearmind]

Thats awesome Blondy - you have thought about all the important things to make sure you look after you first. They are good skills to have even if you don't take it on as a career.

All the best