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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: Mind Games ?  (Read 370 times)
Grissum69
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 66



« on: December 26, 2013, 08:46:13 PM »

Well after a rough Christmas day I think I don't have anymore tears to produce at least for a while...      anyways...   is this how it always is playing mind games all the time?  I was blocked again from her on FB, i can almost guarantee this wont last long it didn't last time either.         So what gives?   I played this facebook tag before her for quite a while and it got tiring real quick.  Anyone else go through this?

I don't have my book yet that I ordered "I hate you  don't leave me"  so I can't peek into all of this just yet.  I did have the pleasure to meet someone last night , a nurse at my local ER.   We got into talking and I found out that her son has BPD, she told me he had gotten into a lot of trouble in his life with addiction and being with the wrong people.  My stay at the ER was pleasant and she made me laugh, we didn't get to get into much conversation because she had other things to attend to but I'm sure I'll be back to see her again so we can talk.  She gave me some insight ... .   I was was content. 
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thisyoungdad
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Posts: 262


« Reply #1 on: December 27, 2013, 01:33:49 AM »

I read that book, and it was helpful to a degree. It helped me understand my own stuff more than hers really. Because in the end I was hating her and yet still desperately wanting her not to divorce me despite the crazy stuff she was doing. I was able to get some insight into her as well of course but I found it helpful and certainly interesting.
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Changingman
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Daughter 15, Son 14
Posts: 644



« Reply #2 on: December 27, 2013, 03:38:53 AM »

Ha yes,

I know a girl who found out on Facebook that her Dad was seriously ill in hospital, last year. No phone call just a post on her brothers timeline.

It's amazing how cold it's getting out there, it's a BPD dream.

Capo:

Jimmy you show me respect to the family, you killed Marchie had your own brother... .Ya dead to me boy, I'm unfriending you!



Mindgames?

Lose them forever,

You know it makes sense!

This was brought to you by healthy relations Inc
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so#overit

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Posts: 28


« Reply #3 on: December 27, 2013, 05:58:55 AM »

Excerpt
Well after a rough Christmas day I think I don't have anymore tears to produce at least for a while...      anyways...   is this how it always is playing mind games all the time?  I was blocked again from her on FB, i can almost guarantee this wont last long it didn't last time either. 

Block her, delete her, assume a new identity, move to a different country... .whatever it takes to not get sucked into that endless black hole.  Just my humble opinion Smiling (click to insert in post)

Last contact I had with my soon to be exBPDh was Dec 9th.  He was "presumably", on his way here from 3 states away, had several jobs lined up ect ect.  He was coming to make things right, do what he said he was going to do, he loved me, didn't want to loose me, I was the one for him blah blah blah. 

I pretty much told him, to drop dead.

I wished for a long time that I had copied/forwarded to myself the love letters I found that he had written his ex, just for insurance for the divorce.  So I thought I'd try logging into his email... .Jackpot!  Genius never changed his password.  Found the letter I was looking for and soo much more.  The best one is an email sent Dec 23 to the same ex.  Saying how sorry he was, he was weak, he hoped she was happy, how he would have to live the rest of his life regretting not being with her.
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