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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: She's back intown ... with a woman  (Read 440 times)
nolisan
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 332



« on: December 29, 2013, 03:01:54 PM »

I shared the other day that I saw the ex back in my small town. Just saw her driving, there was no contact. I hadn't seen her for over a year and didn't enjoy the reminder. I wonder what the heck she was doing intown and was preparing mental for a visit (won't answer the door or phone).

Word travels fast in a small town and I hear that she is staying with a woman who is also a nut case. The ex is "pan-sexual" and an unrecovered love/sex addict.

I'm not a suspicous type but I had vague feelings that the ex was fooling around on me when she would call frequent time outs in the r/s.

Anyway - I hope it is just a holiday visit and she hasn't moved in with this woman. I just really don't relish  the idea of seeing or bumping into her.

I am surprised to see her back. She hated this town and had burnt her bridges (except one I see). In the end I had taken my power back when I told her to get the f... .out - she moved back with her husband 300 miles away. So who knows ... .it's possible he put the run on her too.

Thats enough time spent thinking about her - just needed to spit that out. I'm getting on with my great new life. Thanks for listening.
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santa
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 725


« Reply #1 on: December 29, 2013, 06:23:49 PM »

There is an article I've read about "the lesbian borderline". Basically it stems from being neglected by their mother at a young age. It's not uncommon. After the way my ex has vilified me and knowing how awful her relationship with her mother is, I won't be the slightest bit surprised for her to show up with a "girlfriend" one day.
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