trying to plan my exit

[simplyasiam]

after six years of a BPD r/s im ready to end this for good.

in the morning im changing my cell number, blocking her on facebook and my home phone. I know going to do my best to total walk away from, I cant start a new year still living this life.

I hope this can be a start to new and happy life

[santa]

Do it because it's the best thing for you. Not just as some New Year's game. This is a serious life decision. Stick with it and don't look back. She's going to laugh because it's New Year's and think it's silly, but do it anyway.

[simplyasiam]

its all for me. ive seen all the BPD life I can  take. I don't care what she thinks. ive left for before and have seen how she can act. I know whats coming from her but im ready

[stepbystep]

great work, I 'm also in the process of ridding myself from a BPD, look at the big picture, what you want for yourself, for the future, keep focused on that, ask for help when you need it, it's small steps but point in the right direction you will get there, happy to chat, and I know you can do this, your reward is happiness and freedom

[heartandwhole]

I hope this can be a start to new and happy life

Me, too, simply!  Keep focusing on your well being and it will happen.  You are taking the hardest step–acknowledging that you are done.  Good for you.   

[simplyasiam]

thank you stepbystep.  the r/s was never a good one we have recycled over 20 times,in the past six years. I know now I always took her out of fear of being alone. I was always holding onto the hope thing would change but they only got worse. with the help of what ive learned here I can see ive been living a text book BPD r/s!

I think im past the hardest part because I have lived apart from her most of the last year.

we started dating again in oct and have been recycling every few weeks.

I told myself  if this cant be changed by the end of the year I have to walk away.

im sick of being walked on used and blamed.

ill no longer reward a child for spitting in my face.

im 2nd thinking doing all this already and its only been a few a hours but I know it did the right thing. I know I can never get my life under control if she is apart of my life.

[iluminati]

Based on your situation, just pull the plug.  You aren't married, you aren't living together and, from what I can tell, you have no other financial obligations or connections.  Just go on with your life.  The faster you do it, the better you will be.

[Pearl55]

Simply


Go for it and RUN! This is the best decision and best of luck!

[simplyasiam]

I do have a financial obligation with her. her name is on the mortgage to my home. I told her in oct I had the paper ready to remove her from the mortgage and she said she would signs them. three days latter she wanted to work things out.

i held off giving them to her or talking about it as we were trying to work things out. yesterday in one of her fits she want to go over the papers, we did, and it all went bad. she says im trying to cheat her out of the home and that she knows this is half hers and that she could get back half the money we up into it so far.

shes never had a job her only income was welfare for the 1st four years then ssi the last year we lived together, ive paid every payment on this place,

im not sure what she wil do from here

[iluminati]

I strongly advise you to consult an attorney, because without a marriage, the particulars of how to unwind the mortgage are way beyond my pay grade.  Bring all the necessary paperwork, the original mortgage documents and any financial proof that you are the one who paid off the mortgage.  When it comes to that, make all contact through your attorney regarding that.  If she contacts you, call the cops, full stop.  You have no obligation to her past that of the work of your attorney.