So my exdBPDw is taking about moving out of state

[that1guy]

The recent, and somewhat, ongoing contact with my ex is taking its toll.

I'm seeing some of what I miss about her, but am keeping my eyes open to all of the other things that drug us down. It's a challenge.

She's talking about moving out of state. I'm trying to find a balance of convincing her it might be a good thing, while not letting her think I'm just pushing her out.

I'm trying not to trigger destructive behavior. But agreeing that a change might do her good.

And it would probably be quite a good thing for me if she left town. A combination of out of mind and out of sight, and getting her out of a smallish town.

[GreenMango]

If you can be diplomatic and generic about it like you mentioned... . it could work.

One way to let the relationship burn out is to be boring. 

[that1guy]

I just found out that she may be loosing her job. She was on final warning for a number of things, including showing up late. Friday, she was over two hours late. She did go straight to the emergency room from there though. She was having trouble catching her breath.

She does have asthma, but also anxiety. I think it was the anxiety. But I don't know if her work knows that.

Is it wrong that I am hoping, a little, that she loses her job and moves away?

The other side of me is worried what she might do to herself if she does loose her job.

[GreenMango]

Those mixed feelings can be confusing.

I dont know if its good or bad.  It just is ... . right now.  And you are hurt.

maybe give yourself some time.  Im sure they will pass.

[Johnny Alias]

Her moving away would be GREAT for you.  Out of sight out of mind as they say. 

One of my ex gfs with STRONG ASPD/NPD traits moved to another state.  It was a HUGE weight off my mind.  She also had a kid, ditched her two little girls back here, and married the guy she was cheating on with me... .

If you can be smart about it I would encourage it.  My last one was going to move away too, but things got all screwed up and she's still here living with a new guy.  I have yet to run into them both, but dread the day it will happen. 

Use the force... . these aren't the droids you're looking for... .