Here it comes barreling down the road... . Mother's day.
She is so dysregulated now how can I even begin to think of doing something "special." I have so much pain, and hurt from all the verbal abuse.
The other night she chased after me as I was going out to study for my major test. She blocked me from closing the car door, "we have things to talk about."
I kept telling her no, and I told her to go.
So her response was to beat the inside of her wrist with the car door so as to make a bruise. I knew what she was trying to do.
I eventually put the car in reverse and she let go of the door and I drove away.
How do I buy flowers for someone like that who is so sick?
How do I make a card that says happy mothers day?
I am emotionally spent.
I know the kids have some expectations , so I will make sure they at least have some form of a normal life for that day. My thoughts are if the kids don't see me giving her a card, then I would be the bad guy. I can splurge for 99 cents I think. Even though she is "paralyzed in bed," unable to do laundry, make sandwiches for lunch, clean the kids rooms.
For me, its all horrific.
My god man, I feel for you. I thought I had it bad when I caught my uBPDxw in bed with my neighbor across the street on Father's Day 2013. I was devastated for months. I've soon come to realize that it was the BEST thing that ever happened to me.
It's so hard when kids are in the mix. That's the ONLY thing that hurts me is how she hurts our kids. Whatever you do (stay or leave) just love them kids up and be the best dad you can be. They are suffering too. They NEED YOU!
Hang in there brother.
