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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: She just signed the settlement  (Read 534 times)
PinkieV
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« on: June 07, 2014, 05:21:41 PM »

DH's uBPDew just posted on FB that she signed the settlement papers, giving DH sole custody. I'll believe it when our lawyer calls, but it seems as if we've had the proverbial agreement on the courthouse steps - the trial is scheduled for 9 a.m. Monday.  Smiling (click to insert in post)
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david
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« Reply #1 on: June 07, 2014, 10:27:49 PM »

I'll believe when your lawyer calls too. Hope it goes that way on Monday.
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Nope
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« Reply #2 on: June 08, 2014, 08:13:41 AM »

Yup. We'll all believe it when the L says it's so. And not a moment before. Could be a big "WOW Don't do it!" sympathy play intended for FB friends. I'm really keeping my fingers crossed for you.
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Matt
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« Reply #3 on: June 08, 2014, 05:52:40 PM »

Yeah, you might have to go to the court tomorrow morning just to be sure.

Maybe print out what she posted, so if there is a trial, that can be shown to the judge.
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PinkieV
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« Reply #4 on: June 09, 2014, 12:51:47 AM »

Our lawyer received the paperwork and emailed it to DH, who just signed. So now she has SS14 for a three week visitation. We have emergency plans in place if need be. Hoping for the best, but expecting a lot of regression.
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Matt
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« Reply #5 on: June 09, 2014, 08:41:45 AM »

Wow - congratulations!
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PinkieV
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« Reply #6 on: June 09, 2014, 10:26:49 AM »

Apparently her lawyer made it absolutely clear on Saturday that if she did not show up, he'd be at the court at 8:45 a.m. To remove himself, and she'd have to deal with that and a trial 15 minutes later. As fun as that would have been to see, we're glad it's over. Taking SS14 out today with his older brother to have some fun.
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david
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« Reply #7 on: June 09, 2014, 11:37:22 AM »

Congratulations !
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momtara
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« Reply #8 on: June 09, 2014, 11:44:18 AM »

Congrats!

Who posts this stuff on FB?  Weird.  I can see why you'd be nervous that it would fall apart.

Hang in there!
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Nope
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« Reply #9 on: June 09, 2014, 12:18:55 PM »

That's great news! Congrats! 

Hopefully it's contagious.    Smiling (click to insert in post)
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PinkieV
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« Reply #10 on: June 10, 2014, 10:49:05 AM »

I hope so too Nope! We get to see BM tonight at SS18's graduation. SS14 had a chance to see her earlier today and he said no, he'd wait. Poor kid. We've already practiced our first boundary - actually second because we had to contact her for the exchange and stood firm with the time. When she (and SS's younger half sister) say why doesn't he come home with them tonight, we will just keep repeating "we're following the settlement, we're following the settlement".
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Forestaken
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« Reply #11 on: June 10, 2014, 01:06:25 PM »

Not to pull the plug on your happy dance music, but... .

My Settlement conference 12/8/13 Divorce decree issued 5/9/14

My re-fi is going on now.  dragging on it their MO.
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